The Cryptogram: A Novel — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The Cryptogram: A Novel
John Stuart Mill · en
A shudder ran through Zillah as she sat by his side, but not a sound
escaped her. She looked up in terror. Had every ray of reason left
her father? Was she to sacrifice herself on so hideous an altar
without even the satisfaction of knowing that she had given him
pleasure? Then she thought that perhaps her father was living again
in the past, and confounding this fearful thing which he was planning
for her with his own joyous wedding. Tears flowed afresh, but
silently, at the thought of the contrast. Often had her ayah
delighted her childish imagination by her glowing descriptions of the
magnificence of that wedding, where the festivities had lasted for a
week, and the arrangements were all made on a scale of Oriental
splendor. She loved to descant upon the beauty of the bride, the
richness of her attire, the magnificence of her jewels, the grandeur
of the guests, the splendor of the whole display--until Zillah had
insensibly learned to think all this the necessary adjuncts of a
wedding, and had built many a day-dream about the pomp which should
surround hers, when the glorious knight whom the fairy tales had led
her to expect should come to claim her hand. But at this time it was
not the sacrifice of all this that was wringing her heart. She gave
it not even a sigh. It was rather the thought that this marriage,
which now seemed inevitable, was to take place here, while her heart
was wrung with anxiety on his account--here in this room--by that
bedside, which her fears told her might be a bed of death. There lay
her father, her only friend--the one for whom she would lay down her
life, and to soothe whose delirium she had consented to this
abhorrent sacrifice of herself. The marriage thus planned was to take
place thus; it was to be a hideous, a ghastly mockery--a frightful
violence to the solemnity of sorrow. She was not to be married--she
was to be sold. The circumstances of that old betrothal had never
been explained to her; but she knew that money was in some way
connected with it, and that she was virtually bought and sold like a
slave, without any will of her own. Such bitter thoughts as these
filled her mind as she sat there by her father's side.
Presently her father spoke again. "Have you any dresses, Zillah?"
"Plenty, papa."
"Oh, but I mean a wedding-dress--a fine new dress; white satin my
darling wore; how beautiful she looked! and a veil you must have, and
plenty of jewels--pearls and diamonds. My pet will be a lovely
bride."
Every one of these words was a stab, and Zillah was dumb; but her
father noticed nothing, of this. It was madness, but, like many cases
of madness, it was very coherent.
"Send for your ayah, dear," he continued; "I must talk to her--about
your wedding-dress."
Zillah rang the bell. As soon as the woman appeared the General
turned to her with his usual feverish manner.