The golden windmill, and other stories — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The golden windmill, and other stories
John Stuart Mill · en
He returned to Paris late in the evening. He would go to Diane’s flat
after she had returned from the theater. She would be a little sleepy,
and comfortable, and comforting. She would wear one of those loose,
clinging, silky things, and she would take him in her arms, and he would
let down her beautiful dark blue-black hair, and then he would make her a
coronet of the red berries. He would make her his queen....
He was too agitated to dine that evening. He walked the streets of Paris,
clasping the red berries wrapped in tissue paper. He kept thinking:
“Now she is resting between the acts. Now she is dancing a _pas seul_
in the second act. Now she is giving her imitation of Yvette Guilbert.
Now she is taking a call. Now the manager speaks to her, congratulating
her—curse him! Now she awaits her cue to go on again.”
He was infinitely patient. He restrained his wild impetus to rush to the
theater. He hung about the streets. He meant to stage-manage his effect
with discretion. He waited some time after the theater was closed. Then,
very slowly, he walked in the direction of her flat. As he mounted the
stairs, he began to realize that he was very exhausted. He wished that he
had not foregone his dinner. However, after the first rapturous meeting
with Diane, he would take a glass of wine. Very quietly he slipped the
key in the lock, and let himself in. (He had always had a key to Diane’s
flat, which was in effect _his_ flat.) Directly he had passed the door he
heard loud sounds of laughter. He swore inwardly. How aggravating! Diane
had brought home some of her friends! There were evidently a good many of
them, from the noise and ribaldry. In the passage were several bottles
and glasses.
He crept along silently to the _portière_ concealing the _salon_. He
could hear Diane’s voice. She was speaking, and after each sentence the
company screamed with laughter. Ah! she was entertaining them with one of
her famous imitations. He stood there and listened. He made a tiny crack
in the curtain and peeped through. Diane was doing a funny little strut,
and speaking in a peculiar way. He listened and watched for three or
four minutes before he realized the truth of what he saw and heard. And
when he did realize it, he had to exert his utmost will-power to prevent
himself from fainting.
The person that Diane was imitating was—_himself_!
The realization seemed to be bludgeoned into him, assisted by a round of
ironic cheers. People were calling out:
“_Brava! brava!_ Diane!”
He heard Babette say:
“Where is the little end-of-a-man?”
And Diane’s voice reply:
“Oh, he is coming back soon, I believe. I forget when.”
A man’s voice—he believed it was the Marquis de Lavernal’s—exclaimed:
“And when is our Diane going to marry it?”
Diane, very emphatically:
“Do not distress yourself, my dear; he’s lost all his money.”