The mill of silence — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The mill of silence
John Stuart Mill · en
Zyp never plucked a flower, or allowed us to do so if she could
prevent it. I well remember the first walk I took with her after her
establishment in the mill, when I was attracted by a rare little
blossom, the water chickweed, which sprouted from a grassy trench, and
pulled it for her behoof. She beat me savagely with her soft hands,
then fell to kissing and weeping over the torn little weed, which
actually appeared to revive a moment under her caresses. I had to
promise with humility never to gather another wild flower so long as I
lived, and I have been faithful to my trust.
The afternoon of her coming old Peg rigged her up some description of
sleeping accommodation in a little room in the attic, and this became
her sanctuary whenever she wished to escape us and be alone. To my
father she was uniformly sweet and coaxing, and he for his part took a
strange fancy to her, and abated somewhat of his demoniacal moodiness
from the date of her arrival.
Yet it must not be imagined, from this description of her softer side,
that Zyp was all tender pliability. On the contrary, in her general
relations with us and others as impure human beings, she was the
veritable soul of impishness, and played a thousand pranks to prove
her title to her parentage.
At first she made a feint of distributing her smiles willfully, by
turn, between Modred and me, so that neither of us might claim
precedence. But Jason was admitted to no pretense of rivalry; though,
to do him justice, he at once took the upper hand by meeting scorn
with indifference. In my heart, however, I claimed her as my especial
property; a demand justified, I felt no doubt, by her manner toward
me, which was marked by a peculiar rebellious tenderness she showed to
no other.
The day after her arrival she asked me to take her over the mill and
show her everything. I complied when the place was empty of all save
us. We explored room by room, with a single exception, the ancient
building.
Of course Zyp said: “There’s a room you haven’t shown me, Renny.”
“Yes,” said I; “the room of silence.”
“Why didn’t we go there?”
“Never mind. There’s something wicked in it.”
“What? Do tell me! Oh, I should love to see!”
“There’s nothing to see. Let it alone, can’t you?”
“You’re a coward. I’ll get the sleepy boy to show me.”
“Come along then,” I said, and, seizing her hand, dragged her roughly
indoors.
We crossed a dark passage, and, pushing back a heavy door of ancient
timber, stood on the threshold of the room of silence. It was not in
nature’s meaning that the name was bestowed, for, entering, the full
voice of the wheel broke upon one with a grinding fury that shook the
moldering boards of the floor.
“Well,” I whispered, “have you seen enough?”