There is something sustaining in the very agitation that accompanies
the first shocks of trouble, just as an acute pain is often a stimulus,
and produces an excitement which is transient strength. It is in the
slow, changed life that follows; in the time when sorrow has become
stale, and has no longer an emotive intensity that counteracts its
pain; in the time when day follows day in dull, unexpectant sameness,
and trial is a dreary routine,—it is then that despair threatens; it is
then that the peremptory hunger of the soul is felt, and eye and ear
are strained after some unlearned secret of our existence, which shall
give to endurance the nature of satisfaction.
This time of utmost need was come to Maggie, with her short span of
thirteen years. To the usual precocity of the girl, she added that
early experience of struggle, of conflict between the inward impulse
and outward fact, which is the lot of every imaginative and passionate
nature; and the years since she hammered the nails into her wooden
Fetish among the worm-eaten shelves of the attic had been filled with
so eager a life in the triple world of Reality, Books, and Waking
Dreams, that Maggie was strangely old for her years in everything
except in her entire want of that prudence and self-command which were
the qualities that made Tom manly in the midst of his intellectual
boyishness. And now her lot was beginning to have a still, sad
monotony, which threw her more than ever on her inward self. Her father
was able to attend to business again, his affairs were settled, and he
was acting as Wakem’s manager on the old spot. Tom went to and fro
every morning and evening, and became more and more silent in the short
intervals at home; what was there to say? One day was like another; and
Tom’s interest in life, driven back and crushed on every other side,
was concentrating itself into the one channel of ambitious resistance
to misfortune. The peculiarities of his father and mother were very
irksome to him, now they were laid bare of all the softening
accompaniments of an easy, prosperous home; for Tom had very clear,
prosaic eyes, not apt to be dimmed by mists of feeling or imagination.
Poor Mrs Tulliver, it seemed, would never recover her old self, her
placid household activity; how could she? The objects among which her
mind had moved complacently were all gone,—all the little hopes and
schemes and speculations, all the pleasant little cares about her
treasures which had made the world quite comprehensible to her for a
quarter of a century, since she had made her first purchase of the
sugar-tongs, had been suddenly snatched away from her, and she remained
bewildered in this empty life. Why that should have happened to her
which had not happened to other women remained an insoluble question by
which she expressed her perpetual ruminating comparison of the past
with the present. It was piteous to see the comely woman getting