thinner and more worn under a bodily as well as mental restlessness,
which made her often wander about the empty house after her work was
done, until Maggie, becoming alarmed about her, would seek her, and
bring her down by telling her how it vexed Tom that she was injuring
her health by never sitting down and resting herself. Yet amidst this
helpless imbecility there was a touching trait of humble, self-devoting
maternity, which made Maggie feel tenderly toward her poor mother
amidst all the little wearing griefs caused by her mental feebleness.
She would let Maggie do none of the work that was heaviest and most
soiling to the hands, and was quite peevish when Maggie attempted to
relieve her from her grate-brushing and scouring: “Let it alone, my
dear; your hands ’ull get as hard as hard,” she would say; “it’s your
mother’s place to do that. I can’t do the sewing—my eyes fail me.” And
she would still brush and carefully tend Maggie’s hair, which she had
become reconciled to, in spite of its refusal to curl, now it was so
long and massy. Maggie was not her pet child, and, in general, would
have been much better if she had been quite different; yet the womanly
heart, so bruised in its small personal desires, found a future to rest
on in the life of this young thing, and the mother pleased herself with
wearing out her own hands to save the hands that had so much more life
in them.
But the constant presence of her mother’s regretful bewilderment was
less painful to Maggie than that of her father’s sullen,
incommunicative depression. As long as the paralysis was upon him, and
it seemed as if he might always be in a childlike condition of
dependence,—as long as he was still only half awakened to his
trouble,—Maggie had felt the strong tide of pitying love almost as an
inspiration, a new power, that would make the most difficult life easy
for his sake; but now, instead of childlike dependence, there had come
a taciturn, hard concentration of purpose, in strange contrast with his
old vehement communicativeness and high spirit; and this lasted from
day to day, and from week to week, the dull eye never brightening with
any eagerness or any joy. It is something cruelly incomprehensible to
youthful natures, this sombre sameness in middle-aged and elderly
people, whose life has resulted in disappointment and discontent, to
whose faces a smile becomes so strange that the sad lines all about the
lips and brow seem to take no notice of it, and it hurries away again
for want of a welcome. “Why will they not kindle up and be glad
sometimes?” thinks young elasticity. “It would be so easy if they only
liked to do it.” And these leaden clouds that never part are apt to
create impatience even in the filial affection that streams forth in
nothing but tenderness and pity in the time of more obvious affliction.