The Mill on the Floss — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The Mill on the Floss
John Stuart Mill · en
of his childhood, not merely with a memory of what he did and what
happened to him, of what he liked and disliked when he was in frock and
trousers, but with an intimate penetration, a revived consciousness of
what he felt then, when it was so long from one Midsummer to another;
what he felt when his school fellows shut him out of their game because
he would pitch the ball wrong out of mere wilfulness; or on a rainy day
in the holidays, when he didn’t know how to amuse himself, and fell
from idleness into mischief, from mischief into defiance, and from
defiance into sulkiness; or when his mother absolutely refused to let
him have a tailed coat that “half,” although every other boy of his age
had gone into tails already? Surely if we could recall that early
bitterness, and the dim guesses, the strangely perspectiveless
conception of life, that gave the bitterness its intensity, we should
not pooh-pooh the griefs of our children.
“Miss Maggie, you’re to come down this minute,” said Kezia, entering
the room hurriedly. “Lawks! what have you been a-doing? I never _see_
such a fright!”
“Don’t, Kezia,” said Maggie, angrily. “Go away!”
“But I tell you you’re to come down, Miss, this minute; your mother
says so,” said Kezia, going up to Maggie and taking her by the hand to
raise her from the floor.
“Get away, Kezia; I don’t want any dinner,” said Maggie, resisting
Kezia’s arm. “I sha’n’t come.”
“Oh, well, I can’t stay. I’ve got to wait at dinner,” said Kezia, going
out again.
“Maggie, you little silly,” said Tom, peeping into the room ten minutes
after, “why don’t you come and have your dinner? There’s lots o’
goodies, and mother says you’re to come. What are you crying for, you
little spooney?”
Oh, it was dreadful! Tom was so hard and unconcerned; if _he_ had been
crying on the floor, Maggie would have cried too. And there was the
dinner, so nice; and she was _so_ hungry. It was very bitter.
But Tom was not altogether hard. He was not inclined to cry, and did
not feel that Maggie’s grief spoiled his prospect of the sweets; but he
went and put his head near her, and said in a lower, comforting tone,—
“Won’t you come, then, Magsie? Shall I bring you a bit o’ pudding when
I’ve had mine, and a custard and things?”
“Ye-e-es,” said Maggie, beginning to feel life a little more tolerable.
“Very well,” said Tom, going away. But he turned again at the door and
said, “But you’d better come, you know. There’s the dessert,—nuts, you
know, and cowslip wine.”
Maggie’s tears had ceased, and she looked reflective as Tom left her.
His good nature had taken off the keenest edge of her suffering, and
nuts with cowslip wine began to assert their legitimate influence.