The Stronger Influence — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The Stronger Influence
John Stuart Mill · en
It surprised no one, and gave considerable satisfaction to her
relations, when Esme, quite soon after Sinclair's return to South
Africa, was married to the man who had been her faithful lover for over
eight years.
On the evening before her marriage she discussed the matter and her
feelings quite frankly with Rose.
"I'm not in love with George," she said, regarding her sister earnestly;
"and I'm not marrying him out of pity. I think chiefly it was a phrase
he used which got me: `We are both of us rather lonely people.' ...
That was how he put it. And suddenly while he spoke a picture of the
lonely years ahead for us flashed across my imagination. It's true, you
know; we are lonely; and we are both still young."
"Yes," Rose agreed. "I'm glad you see it like that. I've hated to
think of you alone always."
"It's a little selfish, and altogether futile, to live wholly in the
past," Esme resumed after a pause. "My love for Paul is a sacred
memory; but it should not prevent me from making George happy. He is
satisfied to take the risk."
"George is a wise man," Rose responded; "he doesn't underrate his power
to win your love. You'll grow very fond of him, Esme; he is a lovable
fellow."
"I am fond of him," Esme answered. "Do you suppose I would marry him
otherwise? I am bidding good-bye to the old life to-night, my dear; I
am not dragging it with me into the life which begins to-morrow. I feel
as though I were beginning all over again. It's a big break, you know."
"I know."
Rose's gaze travelled round the comfortable, homelike room, which from
to-morrow would be deserted, and would ultimately pass to strangers.
Henceforward Esme would live in Uitenhage, where George's work was. He
had furnished a house for her, and bought a car. The sight of the car,
which he purposed learning to drive, had reconciled John to his aunt's
second marriage. John's mother, while she gazed about her, was thinking
of many things, other than motors, which might change and brighten her
sister's life. There was the possibility of children. Esme had always
desired children. A baby's tiny hands would speedily heal old wounds;
the feel of baby lips would stifle all regrets. In Rose's opinion this
marriage was altogether desirable; it closed the past completely. In a
sense it seemed to her that her sister's life was only now beginning.
The curtain had rung down on the prologue, and was about to rise for the
first act of the actual drama.