The Stronger Influence — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The Stronger Influence
John Stuart Mill · en
Esme, entering later than the rest, found a seat at the principal table
reserved for her. On her right was seated the old gentleman who had
been her fellow-traveller. He looked up when she took her seat and
spoke to her. She turned from answering him and took quiet observation
while she leisurely unfolded her napkin of the man who was seated on her
left.
He was a man of about twenty-eight, tall and broadly built, with however
an air of delicacy about him altogether inconsistent with his physique.
He was round-shouldered, and his hands, long and remarkably white,
suggested that their owner had never performed any hard work in his
life. His face was altogether striking, strong and fine, with clear cut
features, and keen dominating grey eyes. When Esme sat down he was
bending forward over his plate and did not once glance in her direction.
He seemed wholly unaware of her entrance, unaware of, or indifferent to
the presence of any one in the room. He confined his attention to his
food, and did not talk, or evince any interest in the talk about him.
Esme, while she looked at him, was keenly alive to the fact that he was
conscious of her presence and of her scrutiny, though he chose to ignore
both. A faint colour showed in his face and mounted to the crisp light
brown hair, which, cut very short, had a tight kink in it as though it
might curl were it allowed to grow. She liked the look of this man,
and, oddly, she was attracted rather than repelled by his taciturn and
unsociable manner. Why should a man staying at a sanatorium not remain
aloof if he wished? The fact of being under the same roof with other
people should not of itself enforce an obligation to be sociable when
one inclines towards an opposite mood. Doubtless, like herself, he had
come to the Zuurberg in quest of health. He looked as if he had been
ill. His hand, she observed when he lifted his glass, was unsteady.
She watched his hands, fascinated and puzzled. It was obvious that he
could not control their shaking, that he was aware of this shakiness and
was embarrassed by it. She felt intensely sorry for him. She also felt
surprise at his self-consciousness. She noticed that he ate very
little. He rose before the sweets, and went out by the window and
seated himself on the stoep.
Conversation brightened with his exit. The people near her seemed in
Esme's imagination to relax: the talk flowed more freely. Even the old
gentleman on her right appeared to share in the general relief: he
turned more directly towards her and entered into conversation. While
the man outside sat alone, smoking his pipe, and looking into the
shadows as the dusk drew closer to the earth.