Keeping Up with William: In which the Honorable Socrates Potter Talks of the Relative Merits of Sense Common and Preferred — Socrates — John Shaqi
Keeping Up with William: In which the Honorable Socrates Potter Talks of the Relative Merits of Sense Common and Preferred
Socrates · en
“Of all the defects that flesh is heir to, a sense of inherited
superiority is the most deplorable. It is worse than insanity or idiocy
or curvature of the spine. There are millions of acres of land in Europe
occupied by nothing but a sense of inherited superiority; there are
millions of hands and intellects in Europe occupied by nothing but
a sense of inherited superiority, while billions of wealth have been
devoted to its service and embellishment. A man who has even a small
amount of it needs a force of porters and footmen to help him tote it
around, and a guard to keep watch for fear that some one will grab his
superiority and run off with it when his back is turned.
“A full equipment of inherited superiority, decorated with a title, a
special dialect, a lot of old armor and university junk, stuck out so
that there wasn't room for more than one outfit in a township. Most
of the bloodshed has been caused by the blunders or the hoggishness
of inherited superiority. It is the nursing bottle of insanity and the
Mellin's Food of crime.
“Now hot air has been the favorite dissipation of kings. James the First
was one of the world's greatest consumers of hot air; enough to put
him into business with the Almighty. To be sure, it was not a full
partnership. It was no absolute Hohenzollern monopoly of mortal
participation.
“There are two kinds of sense in men--common and preferred, plain and
fancy. The common has become the great asset of mankind; the preferred
its great liability. Our forefathers had large holdings of the common,
certain kings and their favorites of the preferred. The preferred
represented an immense bulk of inherited superiority and an alleged pipe
line leading from the king's throne to Paradise, and connected with the
fount of every blessing by the best religious plumbers. It always drew
dividends, whether the common got anything or not. The preferred holders
ran the plant and insisted that they held a first mortgage on it. When
they tried to foreclose with military power to back them, some of our
forefathers got out.
“We, their sons, are now crossing the seas to take up that ancient issue
between sense common and preferred and to determine the rights of each.
We are fighting for the foundations of Democracy--the dictates of common
sense.
“For the sake of saving time, I hope you will grant me license to resort
to the economy of slang. A man might do worse these days. There is one
great destroyer of common sense. It is hot air. I remember how scared of
it the Yankees used to be. They were most economical with their praise.
I never heard a word of it in my youth. It came to me after some travel
now and then--never to my face. They knew the deadly power of it--those
Yankees.
[Illustration: 0025]