A Comic History of the United StatesHopkins, Livingston
History
A Comic History of the United States
Hopkins, Livingston
United States -- History -- Humor
We take it for granted, (you may have noticed that a great deal is taken
for granted in this book,) that the reader is already acquainted with
the duties of the President of the United States. If not, let him lose
no time in reading up on the subject, for we are all liable at any
moment to be nominated to the office, and it would be dreadfully
mortifying not to know how to go to work.
We have seen in the preceding chapters how liberty was planted on
American soil, but the crop must be watched and taken care of, and for
this duty the office of PRESIDENT was created. Eighteen different
persons have successively undertaken the contract of guarding the crop
sown by our forefathers, and in one or two incidents, we regret to say,
these have turned out to be mere scarecrows, and sorry ones at that.
This scathing remark is not intended to apply to
GEORGE WASHINGTON,
who, as we have already shown, was the first President of the United
States, and who did as well as could be expected for a first attempt. In
fact, George did well whatever he undertook to do, and we have no
complaint to make in these pages against him.
On page 151 will be found some illustrated particulars concerning this
great man’s life, which our readers, young and old, will do well to
imitate. The series of silhouettes at the top of the page treat of the
Story of the Little Hatchet.
[Illustration]
No. 1. Here we see the Grandfather of his Country climbing a cherry tree
after cherries.
No. 2. His little son (afterwards Father of his Country) is here seen
chopping at said tree with his little hatchet.
No. 3. How should he know that the old man was up said tree, and if so,
what business had he up there anyhow?
No. 4. “I’ll let you know,” is what the old gentleman remarked. “I did
it with my little hatchet,” roared George as well as he could from his
embarrassing position, “but I’ll never do so no more!”
_Advice gratis._ When you chop down cherry trees wait until the old man
goes out of town.
No. 5. Gives us a fine view of the site of Washington’s birthplace, and
shows what an enterprising man Dr. Binks is.
No. 6. The crop of persons who have missed and otherwise remember
Washington is pretty good this year.
No. 7. Here we have a party who does _not_ remember Washington to any
great extent. Thinks he has heard the name somewhere.
“O piteous spectacle!”
Washington’s immediate successor was
JOHN ADAMS,
who was inaugurated March 4, 1797. He displayed superior capacity for
the position by removing the national capital from Philadelphia to
Washington, where it has remained ever since. It was a good riddance for
Philadelphia, but rather severe on Washington.
[Illustration:
_MR. ADAMS REMOVING THE CAPITOL TO WASHINGTON_
]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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