An Almond for a Parrot: Being a reply to Martin Mar-Prelate.
Religion
An Almond for a Parrot: Being a reply to Martin Mar-Prelate.
Marprelate controversy
truth, Lamhethical whelps, Spanish Inquisitours. Thinke you this myrie
mouthed mate, a partaker of heauenly inspiration, that thus aboundes in
his vncharitable railings: yet are these nothing in comparison of his
auncient burlibond adiunctes, that so pester his former edition with
their vnweldie phrase, as no true syllogisme can haue elbowe roome where
they are. In which Alphabet these that followe may bee placed: bounsing
Priests, terrible Priests, venerable Maisters, proud and pontificall
Patripolitians. Gentle reader, I giue you but a tast of them by the waie,
that you may knowe them the next time you meete them in your dish, and
learne to discerne a poysonous scorpion from wholesome fish. _Martin_
you must thinke, was moude, when his gun-pouder papers were fired aboute
his eares, and the spendthriftes his Printers, haled to the prison their
patrimonies. Wherefore I cannot blame him though he sends abroade his
Letters of supplication, in behalfe of his seruants that did but his
bidding. The Church, the Church is persecuted amongst you my maisters,
and _Martin_ gettes nere a superintendentship by the shift, but let not
_Meg Law._ crie once more to the Churchwardens for her foode, least shee
bring with her a campe royall of scoldes, to scratch out your eyes. Oh
she will declaime brauely ouer a Cuckstoole, and plaie the gyant in a
narrowe lane with her distaffe. Maister _Cooper_ shall haue his stipend
still at Paules chaine, or else shee will sweat for it. I lyke such a
wench that will stande to her tackling, why Bishoppes are but men, and
she will carrie a _Martin_ in her plackarde in despite of the proudest of
them all. Learne of her you London Matrones, to make hodie-peeles of your
husbandes, and leade them like good soules up and downe the streetes by
the hornes, let it be seene by your courages in scolding, that women haue
soules, which a balde eloquent brother of yours, denide not long since
in his Sermon at Lichfielde. I, I, my maisters, you may mocke, on as
you see cause, but I warrant you the good olde true-pennie _Marprelate_
is not so merrie, hee sits ruminating under an oake, or in the bottome
of a haystacke, whose bloud shall be first spilte in the reformation of
the Church. And not without cause, for hee that hath so lately felte
the paine of worming and launcing, cannot but stande in awe of _Buls_
slicing tooles one two moneths after. O it is a hairebrande whooresonne,
and well seene in Phlebotomie, if a but once take knife in hande, cha
will as soone let out the seditious humours forth a Martinistes bodie,
as the best he in England, that hath bin twentie yeeres practioners
in Surgerie. Good munckie face Machiuell, shew but thy head once, and
trie him at my request, and if he doe it not more handsomely, then
those whom thou callest Butchers and Horseleeches, then neuer trust an
olde ladde whilest thou liuest. How euer it happens, thou bearest thy
resolution in thy mouth at highe midnight, and hast Scripture enough
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