that reason he had restrained and chilled his emotions, since he was
aware that they incline to content themselves with a happy
approximation, a state of semi-completion. Were these enslaved emotions
now taking their vengeance on him, by leaving him in the lurch, by
refusing to forward and lubricate his art; and were they bearing off
with them every enjoyment, every live interest in form and expression?
Not that he was producing anything bad; his years gave him at least this
advantage, that he felt himself at all times in full and easy possession
of his craftsmanship. But while the nation honoured him for this, he
himself was not content; and it seemed to him that his work lacked the
marks of that fiery and fluctuating emotionalism which is an enormous
thing in one's favour, and which, while it argues an enjoyment on the
part of the author, also constitutes, more than any depth of content,
the enjoyment of the amateur. He feared the summer in the country, alone
in the little house with the maid who prepared his meals, and the
servant who brought them to him. He feared the familiar view of the
mountain peaks and the slopes which would stand about him in his boredom
and his discontent. Consequently there was need of a break in some new
direction. If the summer was to be endurable and productive, he must
attempt something out of his usual orbit; he must relax, get a change of
air, bring an element of freshness into the blood. To travel, then--that
much was settled. Not far, not all the way to the tigers. But one night
on the sleeper, and a rest of three or four weeks at some pleasant
popular resort in the South. . . .
He thought this out while the noise of the electric tram came nearer
along the Ungererstrasse; and as he boarded it he decided to devote the
evening to the study of maps and time-tables. On the platform it
occurred to him to look around for the man in the straw hat, his
companion during that most significant time spent waiting at the
station. But his whereabouts remained uncertain, as he was not to be
seen either at the place where he was formerly standing, or anywhere
else in the vicinity of the station, or on the car itself.
II
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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