England, My EnglandLawrence, D. H. (David Herbert)
General
England, My England
Lawrence, D. H. (David Herbert)
England -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction; Short stories, English
But Egbert! What are you to do with a man like Egbert? He had no vices.
He was really kind, nay generous. And he was not weak. If he had been
weak Winifred could have been kind to him. But he did not even give her
that consolation. He was not weak, and he did not want her consolation
or her kindness. No, thank you. He was of a fine passionate temper, and
of a rarer steel than she. He knew it, and she knew it. Hence she was
only the more baffled and maddened, poor thing. He, the higher, the
finer, in his way the stronger, played with his garden, and his old
folk-songs and Morris-dances, just played, and let her support the
pillars of the future on her own heart.
And he began to get bitter, and a wicked look began to come on his
face. He did not give in to her; not he. There were seven devils inside
his long, slim, white body. He was healthy, full of restrained life.
Yes, even he himself had to lock up his own vivid life inside himself,
now she would not take it from him. Or rather, now that she only took
it occasionally. For she had to yield at times. She loved him so, she
desired him so, he was so exquisite to her, the fine creature that he
was, finer than herself. Yes, with a groan she had to give in to her
own unquenched passion for him. And he came to her then—ah, terrible,
ah, wonderful, sometimes she wondered how either of them could live
after the terror of the passion that swept between them. It was to her
as if pure lightning, flash after flash, went through every fibre of
her, till extinction came.
But it is the fate of human beings to live on. And it is the fate of
clouds that seem nothing but bits of vapour slowly to pile up, to pile
up and fill the heavens and blacken the sun entirely.
So it was. The love came back, the lightning of passion flashed
tremendously between them. And there was blue sky and gorgeousness for
a little while. And then, as inevitably, as inevitably, slowly the
clouds began to edge up again above the horizon, slowly, slowly to lurk
about the heavens, throwing an occasional cold and hateful shadow:
slowly, slowly to congregate, to fill the empyrean space.
And as the years passed, the lightning cleared the sky more and more
rarely, less and less the blue showed. Gradually the grey lid sank down
upon them, as if it would be permanent.
Why didn’t Egbert do something, then? Why didn’t he come to grips with
life? Why wasn’t he like Winifred’s father, a pillar of society, even
if a slender, exquisite column? Why didn’t he go into harness of some
sort? Why didn’t he take _some_ direction?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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