Fanny and the Servant ProblemJerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
General
Fanny and the Servant Problem
Jerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
Comedy plays; English drama; Married people -- Drama
DR. FREEMANTLE [_talking as he enters_]. Wonderful! Wonderful! I don’t
really think I ever remember so fine a spring.
BENNET [_he is making up the fire_]. I’m afraid we shall have to pay for
it later on.
DR. FREEMANTLE. I expect so. Law of the universe, you know, Bennet—law
of the universe. Everything in this world has got to be paid for.
BENNET. Except trouble. [_The doctor laughs_.] The Times? [_He hands
it to him_.]
DR. FREEMANTLE. Thanks. Thanks. [_Seats himself_.] Won’t be long—his
lordship, will he?
BENNET. I don’t think so. I told him you would be here about eleven.
DR. FREEMANTLE. Um—what do you think of her?
BENNET. Of—of her ladyship?
DR. FREEMANTLE. What’s she like?
BENNET. [_They have sunk their voices_.] Well, it might have been
worse.
DR. FREEMANTLE. Ah! There’s always that consolation, isn’t there?
BENNET. I think her ladyship—with _management_—may turn out very
satisfactory.
DR. FREEMANTLE. You like her?
BENNET. At present, I must say for her, she appears willing to be
taught.
DR. FREEMANTLE. And you think it will last?
BENNET. I think her ladyship appreciates the peculiarity of her
position. I will tell the Miss Wetherells you are here.
DR. FREEMANTLE. Ah, thanks!
BENNET. I fancy her ladyship will not herself be visible much before
lunch time. I understand she woke this morning with a headache. [_He
goes out_.]
_The Doctor reads a moment_. _Then the door of the dressing-room opens_,
_and Fanny enters_. _Her dress is a wonderful contrast to her costume of
last evening_. _It might be that of a poor and demure nursery
governess_. _Her hair is dressed in keeping_. _She hardly seems the
same woman_.
FANNY [_seeing the Doctor_, _she pauses_]. Oh!
DR. FREEMANTLE [_rises_]. I beg pardon, have I the pleasure of seeing
Lady Bantock?
FANNY. Yes.
DR. FREEMANTLE. Delighted. May I introduce myself—Dr. Freemantle? I
helped your husband into the world.
FANNY. Yes. I’ve heard of you. You don’t mind my closing this door, do
you? [_Her very voice and manner are changed_.]
DR. FREEMANTLE [_a little puzzled_]. Not at all.
FANNY [_she closes the door and returns_]. Won’t—won’t you be seated?
DR. FREEMANTLE. Thanks. [_They both sit_.] How’s the headache?
FANNY. Oh, it’s better.
DR. FREEMANTLE. Ah! [_A silence_.] Forgive me—I’m an old friend of the
family. You’re not a bit what I expected.
FANNY. But you like it? I mean you think this—[_with a gesture_]—is all
right?
DR. FREEMANTLE. My dear young lady, it’s charming. You couldn’t be
anything else.
FANNY. Thank you.
DR. FREEMANTLE. I merely meant that—well, I was not expecting anything
so delightfully demure.
FANNY. That’s the idea—“seemly.” The Lady Bantocks have always been
“seemly”? [_She puts it as a question_.]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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