Well, the lecthir's over, and I'm kilt out and out. My bitther curse upon the man that invinted the same Boord! I thought ons't I'd fadomed the say ov throuble; and that was when I got through fractions at Ould Mat Kavanagh's school, in Firdramore--God be good to poor Mat's sowl, though he did deny the cause the day he suffered! but it's fluxions itself we're set to bottom now, sink or shwim! May I never die if my head isn't as throughother as anything wid their ordinals and cardinals--and, begob, its all nothing to the econimy lecthir that I have got to go to at two o'clock. Howandiver, I mustn't forget that we left his Riv'rence and his Holiness sitting fornenst one another in the parlor ov the Vatican, jist afther mixing their second tumbler. When they had got well down into the same, they fell, as I was telling you, into larned discourse. For, you see, the Pope was curious to find out whether Father Tom was the great theologinall that people said; and says he, "Misther Maguire," says he, "what answer do you make to the heretics when they quote them passidges agin thransubstantiation out ov the Fathers?" says he. "Why," says his Riv'rence, "as there should be no sich passidges I make myself mighty aisy about them; but if you want to know how I dispose ov them," says he, "just repate one ov them," says he, "and I'll show you how to catapomphericate it in two shakes." "Why, then," says the Pope, "myself disremimbers the particlar passidges they alledge out of them old felleys," says he, "though sure enough they're more numerous nor edifying--so we'll jist suppose that a heretic was to find sich a saying as this in Austin, 'Every sinsible man knows that thransubstantiation is a lie'--or this out of Tertullian or Plutarch, 'the Bishop ov Room is a common imposther,' now tell me, could you answer him?" "As easy as kiss," says his Riv'rence. "In the first, we're to understand that the exprission, 'Every sinsible man,' signifies simply, 'Every man that judges by his nath'ral sinses;' and we all know that nobody folleying them seven deludhers could ever find out the mysthery that's in it, if somebody didn't come in to his assistance wid an eighth sinse, which is the only sinse to be depended on, being the sinse ov the Church. So that, regarding the first quotation which your Holiness has supposed, it makes clane for us, and tee-totally agin the heretics." "That's the explanation sure enough," says his Holiness; "and now what div you say to my being a common imposther?" "Faix, I think," says his Riv'rence, "wid all submission to the better judgment ov the learned father that your Holiness has quoted, he'd have been a thrifle nearer the truth, if he had said that the Bishop ov Room is the grand imposther and top-sawyer in that line over us all." "What do you mane?" says the Pope, getting quite red in the face.