Gothic fiction; Ireland -- History -- Rebellion of 1798 -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Romans à clef
None sufficiently consider, when they describe the hateful picture of
crime, how every step taken in its mazy road, perverts, and petrifies
the feeling. Calantha, in long retrospect over her former life, thought
only of the neglect and severity of him she had abandoned. She dwelt
with pleasure upon the remembrance of every momentary act of violence,
and thought of his gaiety and merriment, as of a sure testimony that
he was not injured by her ill conduct. “He left me first,” she said.
“He loves me not; he is happy; I alone suffer.” And the consolation
she derived from such reflections steeled her against every kindlier
sentiment.
Lord Avondale returned. There was no look of joy in his countenance—no
radiant heartfelt smile which bounding spirits and youthful ardour
once had raised. His hollow eye betokened deep anxiety; his wasted
form, the suffering he had endured. Oh, can it be said that the
greatest pang to a heart, not yet entirely hardened, is unsuspicious
confidence? Oh, can the momentary selfish pang a cold dissembling
hypocrite may feel, be compared to the unutterable agony of such a
meeting? Conscience itself must shrink beneath the torture of every
glance. There is the record of crime—there, in every altered lineament
of that well known face. How pale the withered cheek—how faint the
smile that tries to make light and conceal the evil under which the
soul is writhing.
And could Calantha see it, and yet live? Could she behold him kind,
compassionating, mournful, and yet survive it? No—no frenzy of despair,
no racking pains of ill requited love, no, not all that sentiment and
romance can paint or fancy, were ever equal to that moment. Before
severity, she had not bowed—before contempt, she had not shed one
tear—against every menace, she felt hardened; but, in the presence of
that pale and altered brow, she sunk at once. With grave but gentle
earnestness, he raised her from the earth. She durst not look upon
him. She could not stand the reproachful glances of that eye, that
dark eye which sometimes softened into love, then flamed again into
the fire of resentment. She knelt not for mercy: she prayed not for
pardon: a gloomy pride supported her; and the dark frown that lowered
over his features was answered by the calm of fixed despair.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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