London (England) -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Upper class -- Fiction
The difficulties of a man in Mr. Meres’ position, with two girls to
bring up, were naturally considerable. Mrs. Clarendon had constantly
advised him to marry again; at which he always shook his head and
maintained silence. The woman who may with safety be taken in marriage
by a poor man given to intellectual pursuits is so extremely difficult
of discovery that Thomas Meres might well shrink from beginning the
search, if only on the plea of lack of leisure; and there were other
reasons withholding him. When the children were young, he had the
assistance of the wife of a friend, whose house he shared; only when
Rhoda was sixteen, her sister being two years younger, did he take the
house in Chelsea, having found a decent woman to act as housekeeper. In
a year or two Rhoda had felt able to spare him this latter expense.
Rhoda’s talents were not exactly of a domestic order, but she was a very
good-hearted and intelligent girl, and was beginning then to understand
something of the hardships of her fathers life. This present illness of
hers had brought serious disturbance into the home; a professional nurse
had been summoned, and Hilda--now a girl of sixteen--had to intermit her
school to look after the house; the one servant they kept was of course
an irresponsible creature.
On the evening of her arrival, Mr. Meres asked Ada to come and sit with
him in his study--a very small room, book-thronged, with one or two
busts of poets, and, over the fireplace, a fine photograph of the
Sistine Madonna. The choice of the picture had a pathetic significance;
no supersensual mystery did it embody in Meres’ eyes, but it stood there
as an ideal of womanhood and of maternity, the everpresent suggestion
of an earthly paradise whereof the gates were closed against him--wifely
love, that which he had never known, the conception of which had for
long years been besmirched in his mind with foul associations for the
loss of this his children’s affection could not compensate him. Nay, the
children had till quite late years been to him a fear and a perpetual
cause of anxious observation. Would they not grow up with their mother’s
character? Was there not impurity in their blood? By a kind fate it was
the father that predominated in them. Yet even now his dread would often
be excited, and especially had that been the case in Rhoda’s illness. It
was to speak of his elder girl that he took Ada apart this evening.
When he spoke on any subject which puzzled or embarrassed him, it was
Mr. Meres’ habit to stroke the length of his nose with the thumb and
forefinger of his left hand, perhaps because this relieved him of the
necessity of looking at the person to whom he addressed himself. He
began by doing so now.
“You find Rhoda sadly pulled down?” he said.
“Yes, she must have suffered very much.”’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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