[Illustration: _A GAROTTE EFFECT._ THIS IS DE ROBINSON, WHO, IN HIS HURRY AND ANXIETY TO BE IN TIME FOR DINNER, PUTS HIS KNUCKLE-DUSTERS IN HIS COAT-TAIL POCKET. (SENSATION SCENE.)] [Footnote E: [Illustration: THE KNUCKLE-DUSTER, OR SOMETHING LIKE IT.]] [Illustration: _ART TREASURES._ _Reginald (who has a fine taste, and is very fond of curious old Glass)._ "NOW, UNCLE, HELP YOURSELF, AND PASS THE BOTTLE."] [Illustration: _YOUNG AMERICA._] [Illustration: _A FRESHENER ON THE DOWNS._] [Illustration: _WHAT IS IT?_ _First Boy (loq.)._ "I TELL YER IT'S 'ED'S HERE!--I SEEN IT MOVE!" _Second Ditto._ "I SAY IT'S AT THIS END, YER STOOPID!--I CAN SEE 'IS EARS!"] [Illustration: _A PAINFUL SUBJECT._ _Old Gent. (with tender feet)._ "NOW, BOY, BE VERY CAREFUL!" _Boy._ "OH, YES, YOUR HONOUR! THESE 'ERE KNOBS 'LL TAKE A BEAUTIFUL POLISH!"] [Illustration: _PRUDENCE._ _Matilda (with the hat)._ "WELL, DEAR, NO ONE EVER PRESUMED TO ADDRESS _ME_. STILL, AFTER ALL THE LETTERS IN THE PAPERS, I THINK NO GIRL OF PREPOSSESSING APPEARANCE SHOULD EVER GO OUT UNPROTECTED; SO I ALWAYS TAKE THOMPSON NOW!"] [Illustration: _HUSH! HUSH!_ _Aunt (handling Young Lady's abundant hair)._ "WHAT A TROUBLE, DEAR KITTY, YOUR HAIR IS TO ONE!" _Dear Kitty._ "OH, AUNTY, IF IT'S A TROUBLE, WHY DON'T YOU PUT KITTY'S HAIR IN YOUR DRAWER, JUST AS YOU DO WITH YOUR OWN?"] [Illustration: _THE QUIP MODEST._ _Swell._ "BOY! WHO'S CAB'S THIS?" _Boy._ "WHAT ODDS IS THAT TO YOU? DO YOU S'POSE MY GOV'N'R GIVES ME BOARD WAGES TO TELL WHO BELONGS TO US?"] [Illustration: _A STOUT ASSERTION._ _Old Party (reads)._ "CRYSTAL PALACE--THIS DAY--FÊTE OF THE AMATEUR GYMNASTIC SOCIETY,--'THAT'S THE HOLIDAY FOR ME!'"] [Illustration: _THE COURTESIES OF TRAVEL._ _Juvenile._ "DO YOU OBJECT TO MY SMOKING A CIGAR, SIR?" _Elderly Party._ "OH NO, CERTAINLY NOT, IF IT DOESN'T MAKE YOU SICK!"] [Illustration: _LOOKING AT IT PLEASANTLY._ _Friend (on the bank)._ "WELL, JACK! HAVE YOU HAD PRETTY GOOD SPORT?" _Jack._ "SPORT! IF YOU CALL IT SPORT TO HAVE NO WATER AND NO FISH, AND TO PAY NINETY POUNDS FOR THREE WEEKS OF IT, I'VE HAD PLENTY!"] [Illustration: _PRACTISING ON A PATIENT._ _Young Practitioner._ "H'M, VERY ODD--! MUST HAVE MADE SOME MISTAKE; THERE'S NOTHING THE MATTER WITH _THIS_ TOOTH. NEVER MIND, TRY AGAIN!"] [Illustration: _AN OFFICE INCIDENT._ _Infuriated Principal, opening Fast Clerk's telegram by mistake (reads)._ "'TOM TIT' SURE TO WIN--TELEGRAPH AND SAY IF YOU WILL HAVE PONY ON--IF SO, SEND CASH TO-DAY!"] [Illustration: _GOING TO COVER._ _Brown (who has given Tomkins, from Town, a Mount)._ "YOU NEEDN'T BE THE LEAST AFRAID. IT'S ONLY HIS PLAY. HE'LL BE ALL RIGHT AFTER HE HAS BEEN OVER A FEW FENCES!"] [Illustration: _THE BATTUE._