JONES, WHO CAN'T SLEEP WELL IN LONDON DURING THE HOT WEATHER, GOES TO HAVE A QUIET NIGHT IN A VILLAGE!! (_Portrait of one of the Village Cochins, &c._)] [Illustration: _WHAT OUR VOLUNTEERS OUGHT_ NOT _TO DO._ THEY OUGHT NOT, FOR ONE THING, TO STAGGER THROUGH QUIET STREETS, DRUMMING AND TRUMPETING LIKE SAVAGES, AT MIDNIGHT.] [Illustration: _DRAMATIC._ _First languid Swell._ "HAW! THEY'RE GOING ON STILL WITH THAT DUNDREARY!" _Second Ditto._ "AW----YA'AS! IT MUST BE A--A--A--A--VEWY HARD WORK FOR A FELLAH TO PERFORM SUCH A--A--CAWACTER EVEWY EVENING."] [Illustration: _RETURN FROM THE RACES--BOIS DE BOULOGNE._ _English Stable boy (to his Pal)._ "I SAY, JONES, ISN'T IT A PITY MOUNSEER HAS NOT GOT ANOTHER HAND FOR THE WHIP?"] [Illustration: _SPIRIT-RAPPING._ _Mr. Dunup._ "I KNOW THAT KNOCK! IT IS! IT MUST BE! YES, IT IS A CREDITOR!!"] [Illustration: _THE GRAND NATIONAL ROSE SHOW._] [Illustration: _THE BOX OF BOOKS FROM LONDON._ "NOW, CLARA--WHAT A SHAME! YOU ALWAYS TAKE THE PRETTY ONES!"] [Illustration: _RAILWAY GRIEVANCE._ DREADFUL OLD FEMALE, WHO, ALTHOUGH SHE WOULD BE HORRIFIED AT THE IDEA OF A CIGAR IN A CARRIAGE, SOLACES HERSELF BY CONSUMING NO END OF PEPPERMINT LOZENGES DURING HER JOURNEY.] [Illustration: _RETALIATION._ A CURE FOR THE BAWLING FISH-SELLERS AT WATERING-PLACES.] [Illustration: _THE SUBMISSIVE HUSBAND._] [Illustration: _A BROKEN COUNTRY._ _Jones (who has accepted a mount with the Harriers, because it is all galloping and no obstacles)._ "OH, YES, LET HIM COME! THAT'S ALL VERY WELL. WHY, IT'S LIKE THE SIDE OF A HOUSE."] [Illustration: _WHICH IS THE BRUTE?_ UPON ONE OF THESE CREATURES MR. RAREY'S METHOD CAN MAKE NO IMPRESSION.] [Illustration: _"WHEN DOCTORS DISAGREE," ETC., ETC._] [Illustration: _THE MORAL OF IT._ _Infuriate Captain._ "YOU SCOUNDREL, I'LL HAVE YOU UP AS SURE AS YOU ARE BORN!" _Cabby._ "WHAT! SUMMONS ME! OH, NO, YOU WON'T, MY LORD.--YOU'LL NEVER TAKE THE TROUBLE." (_Exit_ CABBY _with three-and-sixpence over his fare._)] [Illustration: _CRINOLINE FOR DOMESTIC USE._ _Missus._ "MARY! GO AND TAKE OFF THAT THING DIRECTLY! PRAY, ARE YOU AWARE WHAT A RIDICULOUS OBJECT YOU ARE?"] [Illustration: _BADLY HIT DURING THE RECENT ENGAGEMENT WITH THE GUARDS._ _Mamma._ "YES, DOCTOR. SHE WILL SIT FOR HOURS WITHOUT SPEAKING A WORD. SHE PERSISTS IN WEARING THE SAME DRESS, AND WON'T PART WITH THE BOUQUET!" _Doctor._ "H'M--WELL, LET'S SEE, WE MUST FIRST GET _THE BALL OUT OF HER HEAD_, AND THEN PERHAPS THE NERVOUS SYSTEM MAY RIGHT ITSELF!"] [Illustration: _A SPIRIT DRAWING. BY OUR OWN MEDIUM._] [Illustration: _SKETCHES AT BRIGHTON._] [Illustration: _BRIGHTON JEWELS._] [Illustration: _A BIT OF HOUSEHOLD STUFF._ _Second Life Guardsman._ "LOR, JEMIMER, WHY WE ARE OUR OWN MASTERS, AND NEVER SHOW NO RESPECT TO NOBODY!" _Jemimer._ "THEN I SUPPOSE YOU'VE SEEN A DEAL OF BATTLES THAT MAKES YOU SO PROUD!"] [Illustration: _A HINT TO THE "ENGAGED ONES" OF ENGLAND._