England -- Fiction; Psychological fiction; Repression (Psychology) -- Fiction; Single women -- Fiction; Women -- England -- Fiction
“You know what he was,” said Robin’s wife. “And look at him now.”
But Harriett’s mind refused, obstinately, to connect the two Robins and
Priscilla.
She remembered that she had to speak to Robin. They went together into
his study. Cissy sent her a look, a signal, and rose; she stood by the
doorway.
“Beatie, you might come here a minute.”
Harriett was alone with Robin.
“Well, Harriett, we haven’t been able to do much for you. In my beastly
state----”
“You’ll get better.”
“Never. I’m done for, Harriett. I don’t complain.”
“You’ve got a devoted wife, Robin.”
“Yes. Poor girl, she does what she can.”
“She does too much.”
“My dear woman, she wouldn’t be happy if she didn’t.”
“It isn’t good for her. Does it never strike you that she’s not strong?”
“Not strong? She’s--she’s almost indecently robust. What wouldn’t I give
to have her strength!”
She looked at him, at the lean figure sunk in the armchair, at the
dragged, infirm face, the blurred, owlish eyes, the expression of abject
self-pity, of self-absorption. That was Robin.
The awful thing was that she couldn’t love him, couldn’t go on being
faithful. This injured her self-esteem.
XI
Her old servant, Hannah, had gone, and her new servant, Maggie, had had
a baby.
After the first shock and three months’ loss of Maggie, it occurred to
Harriett that the beautiful thing would be to take Maggie back and let
her have the baby with her, since she couldn’t leave it.
The baby lay in his cradle in the kitchen, black-eyed and rosy, doubling
up his fat, naked knees, smiling his crooked smile, and saying things to
himself. Harriett had to see him every time she came into the kitchen.
Sometimes she heard him cry, an intolerable cry, tearing the nerves and
heart. And sometimes she saw Maggie unbutton her black gown in a hurry
and put out her white, rose-pointed breast to still his cry.
Harriett couldn’t bear it. She could not bear it.
She decided that Maggie must go. Maggie was not doing her work properly.
Harriett found flue under the bed.
“I’m sure,” Maggie said, “I’m doing no worse than I did, ma’am, and you
usedn’t to complain.”
“No worse isn’t good enough, Maggie. I think you might have tried
to please me. It isn’t every one who would have taken you in the
circumstances.”
“If you think that, ma’am, it’s very cruel and unkind of you to send me
away.”
“You’ve only yourself to thank. There’s no more to be said.”
“No, ma’am. I understand why I’m leaving. It’s because of Baby. You
don’t want to ‘ave ‘im, and I think you might have said so before.”
That day month Maggie packed her brown-painted wooden box and the cradle
and the perambulator. The greengrocer took them away on a handcart.
Through the drawing-room window Harriett saw Maggie going away, carrying
the baby, pink and round in his white-knitted cap, his fat hips bulging
over her arm under his white shawl. The gate fell to behind them. The
click struck at Harriett’s heart.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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