English drama -- 20th century; English fiction -- 20th century; Short stories, English
It happened at a dinner-party given by the Cravisters. Dr. Cravister
was the Headmaster of Æsop--a good, gentle, learned old man, with
snow-white hair and a saintly face which the spirit of comic irony had
embellished with a nose that might, so red and bulbous it was, have
been borrowed from the properties of a music-hall funny man. And then
there was Mrs. Cravister, large and stately as a galleon with all
sails set. Those who met her for the first time might be awed by the
dignity of what an Elizabethan would have called her "swelling port."
But those who knew her well went in terror of the fantastic spirit
which lurked behind the outward majesty. They were afraid of what that
richly modulated voice of hers might utter. It was not merely that she
was malicious--and she had a gift of ever-ready irony; no, what was
alarming in all her conversation was the element of the unexpected.
With most people one feels comfortably secure that they will always
say the obvious and ordinary things; with Mrs. Cravister, never. The
best one could do was to be on guard and to try and look, when she
made a more than usually characteristic remark, less of a bewildered
fool than one felt.
Mrs. Cravister received her guests--they were all of them boys--with
stately courtesy. They found it pleasant to be taken so seriously, to
be treated as perfectly grown men; but at the same time, they always
had with Mrs. Cravister a faint uncomfortable suspicion that all her
politeness was an irony so exquisite as to be practically
undistinguishable from ingenuousness.
"Good evening, Mr. Gay," she said, holding out her hand and shutting
her eyes; it was one of her disconcerting habits, this shutting of the
eyes. "What a pleasure it will be to hear you talking to us again
about eschatology."
Gay, who had never talked about eschatology and did not know the
meaning of the word, smiled a little dimly and made a protesting
noise.
"Eschatology? What a charming subject!" The fluty voice belonged to
Henry Cravister, the Headmaster's son, a man of about forty who worked
in the British Museum. He was almost too cultured, too erudite.
"But I don't know anything about it," said Gay desperately.
"Spare us your modesty," Henry Cravister protested.
His mother shook hands with the other guests, putting some at their
ease with a charming phrase and embarrassing others by saying
something baffling and unexpected that would have dismayed even the
hardiest diner-out, much more a schoolboy tremblingly on his good
behaviour. At the tail end of the group of boys stood Dick and Francis
Quarles. Mrs. Cravister slowly raised her heavy waxen eyelids and
regarded them a moment in silence.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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