The provision in nature of infinity ever present to us is an immense
help. No man can look up to the stars at night and reflect upon what
lies behind them without feeling that the tyranny of the senses is
loosened, and the tyranny, too, of the conclusions of his logic. The
beyond and the beyond, let us turn it over as we may, let us consider it
as a child considers it, or by the light of the newest philosophy, is a
constant, visible warning not to make our minds the measure of the
universe. Underneath the stars what dreams, what conjectures arise,
shadowy enough, it is true; but one thing we cannot help believing as
irresistibly as if by geometrical deduction—that the sphere of that
understanding of ours, whose function it seems to be to imprison us, is
limited.
Going through a churchyard one afternoon I noticed that nearly all the
people who were buried there, if the inscriptions on the tombstones might
be taken to represent the thoughts of the departed when they were alive,
had been intent solely on their own personal salvation. The question
with them all seemed to have been, shall _I_ go to heaven? Considering
the tremendous difference between heaven and hell in the popular
imagination, it was very natural that these poor creatures should be
anxious above everything to know whether they would be in hell or heaven
for ever. Surely, however, this is not the highest frame of mind, nor is
it one to be encouraged. I would rather do all I can to get out of it,
and to draw others out of it too. Our aim ought not so much to be the
salvation of this poor petty self, but of that in me which alone makes it
worth while to save me; of that alone which I hope will be saved,
immortal truth. The very centre of the existence of the ordinary
chapel-goer and church-goer needs to be shifted from self to what is
outside self, and yet is truly self, and the sole truth of self. If the
truth lives, _we_ live, and if it dies, we are dead. Our theology stands
in need of a reformation greater than that of Luther’s. It may be said
that the attempt to replace the care for self in us by a care for the
universal is ridiculous. Man cannot rise to that height. I do not
believe it. I believe we can rise to it. Every ordinary unselfish act
is a proof of the capacity to rise to it; and the mother’s denial of all
care for her own happiness, if she can but make her child happy, is a
sublime anticipation. It may be called an instinct, but in the course of
time it will be possible to develop a wider instinct in us, so that our
love for the truth shall be even maternally passionate and
self-forgetting.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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