Mr. Pim Passes By: A Comedy in Three ActsMilne, A. A. (Alan Alexander)
General
Mr. Pim Passes By: A Comedy in Three Acts
Milne, A. A. (Alan Alexander)
English drama -- 20th century
GEORGE (_at the windows--he does not see_ BRIAN). Hullo! Hullo! Hullo!
What's all this about a Mr. Pim? Who is he? Where is he? (_He puts his
cap on table, and comes down, into room_.) I had most important business
with Lumsden, and the girl comes down and cackles about a Mr. Pim, or
Ping, or something. Where did I put his card? (_Bringing it out_.)
Carraway Pim. Never heard of him in my life, (_Moves back to
writing-table and puts down card_.)
DINAH. He said he had a letter of introduction, Uncle George.
GEORGE. Oh, you saw him, did you! (_Comes down_ C. _to_ R.) Yes, that
reminds me, there was a letter--(_he brings it out and reads it_).
DINAH. He had to send a telegram. He's coming back.
OLIVIA. Pass me those scissors, Brian.
BRIAN (_crossing to above table_ L.C.). These? (_he passes them_.)
OLIVIA (_giving_ BRIAN _a nod of encouragement and looking round at_
DINAH). Thank you.
GEORGE (_reading_). Ah well, a friend of Brymer's, Glad to oblige him.
Yes, I know the man he wants. Coming back, you say, Dinah? (DINAH
_nods_.) Then I'll be going back too. Send him down to the farm, Olivia,
when he comes. (_Going up meets_ BRIAN.) Hallo, what happened to you?
(_Still moving up a little_.)
OLIVIA. Don't go, George, there's something we want to talk about. (DINAH
_gives a long whistle. All look sheepish and_ GEORGE _notices their
attitude_.)
GEORGE. Hallo, what's this?
BRIAN (_quickly and over back of i.e. table to_ OLIVIA). Shall I---!
(DINAH _pantomimes. "Yes, do."_)
OLIVIA (_with a roguish loot at_ DINAH). Yes, (_Sticks needle in work_.)
BRIAN (_stepping out to_ C.) I've been wanting to tell you all this
morning, sir, only I didn't seem to have an opportunity of getting it
out.
GEORGE. Well, what is it?
(BRIAN, _taken aback for a moment, looks to_ OLIVIA _for encouragement.
She nods approval and turning to_ DINAH, _takes her hand encouragingly--
_)
BRIAN (_boldly_). I want to marry Dinah, sir.
GEORGE. You want to marry Dinah? God bless my soul!
DINAH (_rushing to him below and to his_ R. _and pulling her cheek
against his coat, and her hands on his shoulder_). Oh, do say you like
the idea, Uncle George.
GEORGE. Like the idea! (_Taking her hands from his shoulder_.) Have you
heard of this nonsense, Olivia?
(_Movement of annoyance from_ DINAH.)
OLIVIA. They've just this moment told me, George. I think they would be
happy together.
GEORGE (_crossing to fire-place_ L., _to_ BRIAN). And what do you propose
to be happy together on?
BRIAN (R.C.). Well, of course, I know it doesn't amount to much at
present, but we shan't starve.
DINAH. Brian got fifty pounds for a picture last March!
GEORGE (_a little upset by this_). Oh! (_Recovering gamely_.) And how
many pictures have you sold since?
BRIAN (_gives a nervous look at_ OLIVIA _and_ DINAH, _who then sits on
settee_ R.). Well, none, but--
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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