But perhaps it would be the fairest arrangement if the Sisters could agree to alternate so ungrateful a _rôle._ RHINO! _First Verse._ _First Sister_ (_placing three of the fingers of her left hand on her heart, and extending her right arm in timid appeal_). Dear sister, of late I’m beginning to doubt If the world is as black as they paint it. It mayn’t be as bad as some try to make out---- _Second Sister_ (_with an elaborate mock curtsy._) That _is_ a discovery! _Mayn’t_ it? _First S._ (_abashed_). I’m sure there are sev’ral who aren’t a bad lot, And some sort of principle seem to have got, For they act on the square---- _Second S._ Don’t you talk tommy-rot! It’s done for advertisement, _ain’t_ it? _Refrain._ _Second S._ Why, there’s nobody at bottom any better than the rest! _First S._ Are you sure of it? _Second S._ I’m telling you, and _I_ know, The principle they act upon’s whatever pays ’em best. And the only real religion now is--Rhino! [_The last word must be rendered with full metallic effect. A step-dance, expressive of conviction on one part and incipient wavering on the other, should be performed between the verses._ _Second Verse._ _First S._ (_returning, shaken, to the charge_). Some _un_married men lead respectable lives. _Second S._ (_decisively_). Well, I’ve never happened to meet them! _First S._ There are husbands who’re always polite to their wives. _Second S._ Of course--if their better halves beat them! _First S._ Some tradesmen have consciences, so I’ve heard said; Their provisions are never adulteratèd, But they treat all their customers fairly instead. _Second S._ ’Cause they don’t find it answer to cheat them! _Refrain._ _First S._ {What? { _Second S._ {No,--They’re none of ’em at bottom any better than the rest. _Second S._ I’m speaking from experience, and _I_ know. If you could put a window-pane in everybody’s breast You’d see on all the hearts was written--“Rhino!” _Third Verse._ _First S._ There are girls you can’t tempt with a title or gold. _Second S._ There may be--but I’ve never seen one. _First S._ Some much prefer love in a cottage, I’m told. _Second S._ (_putting her arms a-kimbo_). If you swallow _that_, you’re a green one! They’ll stick to their lover so long as he’s cash, When it’s gone, they look out for a wealthier mash. A girl on the gush talks unpractical trash-- When it comes to the point, she’s a keen one! _Refrain._ _First S._ Then, are none of us at bottom any better than the rest! _Second S._ (_cheerfully_). Not a bit; I am a girl myself and _I_ know. _First S._ You’d surely never give your hand to someone you detest?