A weakness seizes on my mind--I would more pudding take; But all in vain--I feel--I feel--my little head will ache. Oh! that I might alone be left, to rest where now I am, And finish with a piece of bread that pot of currant-jam. I gaze upon the cake with tears, and wildly I deplore That I must take a powder if I touch a morsel more, Or oil of castor, smoothly bland, will offer'd be to me, In wave pellucid, floating on a cup of milkless tea. It may be so--I cannot tell--I yet may do without; They need not know, when left alone, what I have been about. I long to cut that potted beef--to taste that apple-pie; I long--I long to eat some more, but have not strength to try. I gasp for breath, and now I know I've eaten far too much; Not one more crumb of all the feast before me can I touch! Susan, oh! Susan ring the bell, and call for mother, dear. My brain swims round--I feel it all--mother, your child is queer! * * * * * _Alix_ (_aged five, to parent who has been trying to inspire her with loyal sentiments_). And was the Queen weally named after me? * * * * * [Illustration: A Toothsome Morsel.-- _Distracted Nurse._ "Gracious, children, what _are_ you doing?" _Children._ "Oh, we've put the meat cover on grandpa's head to keep the flies off him!"] * * * * * [Illustration: "Drat the boy! What have you got that string tied on that fowl's leg for?" "'Tain't our fowl, muvver!"] * * * * * [Illustration: _Snooks_ (_who fancies himself very much_). "What's she crying for?" _Arabella._ "It's all right, sir. She was frightened. When she saw _you_ she thought it was a _man_!"] * * * * * [Illustration: BLASÉ _Kitty_ (_reading a fairy tale_). "'Once upon a time there was a frog----'" _Mabel_ (_interrupting_). "I bet it's a princess! Go on!"] * * * * * PHYSICS.--"Now, George, before you go and play, are you quite sure you know the lesson Professor Borax gave you to learn?" "O, yes, mamma!" "Well, now, what causes heat without light?" "Pickles!" * * * * * _Mother._ Well, Dorothy, would you like your egg poached or boiled? _Dorothy_ (_after weighing the question_). Which is the most, mother? * * * * * [Illustration: THE ADVANTAGES OF EDUCATION _Small Boy._ "Look 'ere, Mawrd! I reckon the chap as keeps this shop ain't bin to school lately; 'e spells '_'all_' with a _haitch_!"] * * * * * [Illustration: "GETTING ON." "Well, Tommy, how are you getting on at school?" "First-rate. I ain't doing so well as some of the other boys, though I can stand on my head; but I have to put my feet against the wall. I want to do it without the wall at all!"] * * * * * [Illustration: LAYING DOWN THE LAW.--