“What are you to live on?” they had
both cried, with horror and alarm. But Nancy was not to be talked to
then more than at other periods. She had informed them that she meant to
live on her own little infinitesimal fortune, the two hundred and fifty
pounds her aunt had left her; and in answer to all their representations
that this would last a very short time, she would deign no reply. She
had determined to do it, and that was enough--as she had determined to
do other foolish things. Matilda had come with her in the spirit of a
martyr. “We must do something to make our own living when she has spent
it all,” Matilda said; “and I won’t forsake her.” Thus Nancy carried out
her foolish intention. She was independent for the moment, obliged to
nobody, whatever might happen to-morrow or next year. Two hundred and
fifty pounds seems a large sum to the inexperienced. And as to the
reason why she came to Oakley, it would have been still more difficult
to tell that. Because it was the last place in the world where Arthur
would be likely to find her, she said. Was it not rather because when
Arthur came to find her (as she had no doubt he would as soon as he
heard “what had happened,”) she would not permit herself to be found at
Underhayes, yet would not either put herself out of his way? However,
Nancy did not herself know what she meant upon this point. A great many
confused and inarticulate feelings were in her mind. Her heart yearned
towards her husband, whom she had loved in her way. Only when she had
driven him from her had she realized how much he was to her; and though
far too proud to make any overtures of reconciliation, all her forlorn
studies, her foolish self-trainings had been one long silent overture,
had anybody known. And now to come to the neighbourhood of his home, to
hear of him, to see the people whom she had stigmatized so often as
fine folks (how the educated Nancy blushed now at such a vulgar
expression!) seemed the greatest attraction in the world to her. She
would not put herself in the way of being noticed by them, but she would
not, on the other hand, make any violent effort to keep out of their
way; and there was something that pleased her fantastic condition of
mind in the mere idea of living there, unknown, yet not too carefully
concealed, indifferent as to whether she was found out or not;
unrevealed, yet not disguised. She would not change her name. She was
Mrs. Arthur, and there she would stay as Mrs. Arthur. If she were
discovered she was harming no one. She had a right to live there if she
pleased. Thus half in longing, half in defiance, Nancy took up her abode
in the little cottage called, nobody knew why, the Wren Cottage,
probably because it was not much bigger than a wren’s nest. Perhaps it
had not occurred to her how much discussion would be raised in the
tranquil little village by her arrival as a stranger; perhaps she did
not care whether she was talked of or not. Indeed, she did not think on
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account