Americans -- China -- Biography; China -- Social life and customs -- 1912-1949; Franking, Mae M.
He went, firmly resolved to change the mind of his family toward me. And
I, too, was anxious for them to know that a foreign marriage had not
harmed Chan-King. During the six weeks of his absence his letters were
cheerfully non-committal, though he spoke of his happiness in being in
his mother's house again. I thought a great deal about that house, the
intricate lives of the people in it and their many degrees of kinship
and authority. Chan-King had told me enough to give me a fairly clear
picture of them. I had always admired their ability to sustain difficult
relations under the same roof with the utmost good temper and mutual
courtesy.
Yet I was Western enough to feel that Chan-King and I knew each other
better and had been more free to learn each other thoroughly, alone in
our own household, which was growing into quite a Chinese fashion. I
expected my second child and looked forward, with much hope, to the new
life, for I had always been deeply maternal and wanted several children.
But to Chan-King and me our love for each other was the greatly
important thing in life--the reason for all the rest of our existence.
We accepted the fact of birth as naturally as we did the change of
seasons. Children were an essential to our happiness, but not the
dominant essential. We ordered our home for ourselves, as two lovers who
had elected to pass their life together.
Chan-King expressed our views thus: "The Chinese idea is that the family
is the end, the children the means of keeping it up. In the West, the
children are the end, and the home merely the means of keeping them up.
You and I have it perfectly adjusted, I think--the home is for all of
us, and all of us have proper places in it."
Chan-King returned early one morning, and I knew, from my first glimpse
of his face, that his visit had been a fruitful one. I flew to his arms,
and, as he kissed me, I saw that his eyes were serene and contented.
"How is your august mother, my lord?" I asked him with a bow.
"My mother is in good health and wishes to meet her daughter-in-law,"
he answered, and, in spite of the bantering tone, I knew he was in
earnest.
I wanted to know how this change of feeling had come about.
"When I told them of you," said Chan-King, "my mother was visibly
amazed. 'I did not understand!' she kept repeating. 'I did not
understand!' And before I left, she said to me, 'If she is all you tell
me she is, why do you not bring her here?' I didn't mention the fact
that this was our first invitation, Margaret! Should you like to go, my
dearest?"
I hesitated a moment. "Yes, but not yet," I answered.
"We will not go for a while," Chan-King assured me.
We talked a great deal about my husband's visit, and I gained new light
on the actual facts of his estrangement from his family and the enormous
significance that his marriage assumed in the minds of his Chinese
relatives.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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