(3) Lastly, I have now bought, out of my earnings, the freehold of the premises in which I carry on my practice. In making out a Balance Sheet this item must be regarded either as a liability or as an asset accordingly as one takes the dark or the bright view of the position. Either I owe myself so much a year for rent of the premises, in which case it is a liability: or else myself owes me so much for rent, in which case it is an asset. Practically speaking it doesn't much matter, because it is a bad debt either way. Those amongst my (apparently) most intimate friends, who are money-lenders, do not ask for details. They are content to assume the worst and hope for the best. Sir Reginald Hartley and Mr. Charles Dugmore, Assessor of Taxes, the most interested enquirers, are not, however, money-lenders. Sir Reginald is not naturally an inquisitive man, and his concern for me, in spite of my frequent appearance at his table, had hitherto been limited to my services in getting the port decanter round its circuit. It was I who, when one evening we were doing this alone, led up to the subject. "Sir Reginald," said I. He passed the port again, hoping thus to damp down my conversational powers. I, hoping to stimulate them, helped myself. "Well, what do you want now, my boy?" he asked reluctantly, noting my unsatisfied air. "I'll tell you what I should like, Sir," said I, "and that's a father-in-law. Would you care for the job?" Not, I think, entirely with a view to what he himself was likely to get out of this suggestion, he asked me outright what I was worth. "I don't think," he suggested, "that I could very well let my Phyllis marry anyone with less than five hundred a year, eh?" I got out paper and pencil, puckered up my brow, and worked out a sum. "I am happy to announce," I said eventually, "that we may put my income on the other side of that figure." To show my _bona fides_, I set out my sum:-- MY INCOME ('14 to '15): L (1) _Fees._ (To estimate this item it is necessary to take actual figures of last three years, which show an annual increase at the rate of about 33%. The '13 to '14 figure is 203 guineas; add 33% and you get total for '14 to '15, 284 pounds, say 300 (2) Add annual value of professional premises, which is 50 (3) _Occasional literature._ This is practically a regular stipend, at the fixed figure of (_circa_) L40. But a happy marriage should promote inspiration. Allowing for same, put this figure at, say. 51 (4) Interest on Investments, say 100 ----- Grand Total. (E. & O. E.) L501 =====