Well, I was atending upon jest such another gent at quite a grand Party the other night; and, when it was all over, the principle Gennelman came up to me and interduced me to him as an Amerrycan Gent as wanted to speak to me, and he then acshally told me as how as my little Book was about one of the most populerest in all the United States! And he then arsked me how many copies we had sold? And when I thort as I shoud estonish him by telling him as I beleeved as it was sumthing about seventeen thowsend, he said as how as that was nothink to what he should have xpected, for a hunderd thowsend would not have surprised him! for he had bin told as how as one of their werry leadingest men, I rayther think as he said it was the Pressident, or a great friend of his whenever he was a good deal bothered about State matters, allers called for a copy of "Robert," for it was quite sure to put him all to rites again, and send him to bed with a jolly larf! Well, I thort as this was all pritty well, but he acshally finished up by arsking me whether I coudent write another wollum jest like the other! for he was sure as any of their grate Publishers coud sell any quantity of em! speshally if they thort it woud take the shine out of the Englisher by saying it was by WASHINGHAM! He then introjuced me to another Amerrycan, and asked him what he thort of his plan? To which he replied that he didn't know much about publishing, but he was quite sure there was nothink in that or in any other matter in which an Amerrycan coud not lick all creation! And then they both went away larfing! Tho what there was to larf at in such a werry serious matter as they had bin a torking about I'm sure I cant make out, the more so as I ain't heard a single word from em since, and even thinks it werry possible as I never shall. Strange to say I had a most wunderful dream that night! I dremt as I was reelly in Amerrykey, and having a long conwersation with a reel live Publisher all about an Amerrycan "Robert"! and jest as we was aranging all about the price, and the number of Wolumes, and the way he was to send me all the money, I suddenly woke, and found myself a lying by the side of Mrs. ROBERT! and about as much estonished as ewer I found myself in all my long life! ROBERT. * * * * * Grumpy. Smelfungus at new customs carps, He says "New Women" are "Old Cats"; Society soon will be be all "sharps," Living in "flats." * * * MOTTO FOR MR. HALL-CAINE.--"The proper study of mankind is (the Isle of) Man!" * * * * * THE PIOUS LYNCHER'S CREED. (_Adapted from the Biglow Papers for the benefit of parsonic defenders of the pleasant practice of Lynching._)