We profoundly hope that there may be no truth in the ugly rumour that one of the CHANCELLOR'S servants, who has been in the family for many years and imbibed its principles, has declared emphatically that it would be against her principles to serve in a ducal household. Needless to say there has been a flutter among estate agents. Already vast tracts of deer-forest in Scotland have been offered at astonishing terms to the proposed Duke, and these not only comprise some of the finest scenery in the British Isles, but afford opportunity for thoroughly interesting agricultural development. Mr. LLOYD GEORGE'S own views on the whole subject were uttered in Welsh, and we have no doubt our readers will quite understand that they cannot be printed here. * * * * * Our Dumb Friends. The tradition of strong language established by our armies in Flanders seems to be well kept up to-day, if we may judge by the following Army Order issued at the Front:-- "Though on occasion it is necessary to tie horses to trees, this should be avoided whenever possible, as they are sure to bark and thus destroy the trees." * * * * * [Illustration: _Patriotic Old Person_ (_to individual bespattered by passing motor-bus_). "THERE, YOUNG FELLER! IT'D NEVER 'AVE BIN NOTICED IF YOU'D BIN IN KHAKI!"] * * * * * A TERRITORIAL IN INDIA. III. My dear _Mr. Punch_,--Although, being no longer a soldier in anything but name (and pay), I pursue in India the inglorious vocation of a clerk, I am nevertheless still in a position to perceive the splendid qualities of the British Officer. Always a humble admirer of his skill and bravery in the field, I have now in addition a keen appreciation of his imperturbable _sangfroid_ when confronted with conditions of great difficulty in the office.