Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 148, January 13th 1915Various
History
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 148, January 13th 1915
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
Blenkins cannot be allowed to leave at this juncture. You should make
a _démarche_ towards the Office Boy, endeavour to ascertain from him
whether _pourparlers_ might not be opened with the Senior Typist in
the direction of her using her influence with the Book-keeper to learn
whether Blenkins' purpose is in the nature of an ultimatum or a
_ballon d'essai_.
3. _From A. M. to J. H. B._
Mr. Blenkins has presented his note. I have the honour to enclose a
copy. The Office Boy is absent for a few days attending the obsequies
of his grandmother. I have telegraphed to his home in the sense of
your despatch. No reply has come, and I have the honour to await Your
Excellency's further orders.
4. _From J. H. B. to A. M._
It is imperative that there should be no delay in this matter. You
should obtain the address of the office-boy's grandfather, and call
upon him to learn whether he will agree to exert his grandparental
influence in the direction already outlined.
5. _From J. H. B. to Uncle Edward, Brother Theodore and Cousin
Bob, co-Directors._
I enclose copies of correspondence relative to the Blenkins' crisis,
which is rapidly assuming a gravity which I cannot affect to view with
indifference. I beg you to proceed immediately to Midgely, and support
his endeavours with the united weight of your diplomatic abilities.
6. _From A. M. to J. H. B._
I learn from a sure source that the Office-Boy's grandmother has
already died three times. The grandfather is alleged to be _non compos
mentis_. Mr. Blenkins is mobilising his office papers. This is highly
significant.
7. _From A. M. to J. H. B._
Further to my despatch of this morning, I have the honour to report
that Mr. Robert Bullivant suggests that we should offer Mr. Blenkins
another twenty pounds a year and have done with it. Mr. Theodore
Bullivant is firmly opposed to any diplomatic weakness at this
juncture, in view of possible demands from the Book-keeper, whom we
suspect of a secret _entente_ with Mr. Blenkins. Your Excellency's
uncle demands peace at any price. Should I take the unprecedented step
of making a direct approach to Mr. Blenkins?
8. _From J. H. B. to A. M._
No. The resources of Diplomacy must first be exhausted. In view of the
urgency of the crisis, I authorise you to pass over the Office Boy and
open _pourparlers_ with the Senior Typist with a view to obtaining a
_mise en demeure_ from Blenkins.
9. _From A. M. to J. H. B._
The Senior Typist has met with a reverse from an experimental
hair-dye, and will not be visible for a week.
10. _From J. H. B. to A. M._
Approach the Book-keeper.
11. _From A. M. to J. H. B._
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