French fiction -- 20th century -- Translations into English
One of those gay, precocious months of February that have so much charm
in Paris. Spring is not yet in the sky or in the heart, but everything
is pure, pure light, the limpid joy of a child that has awakened. The
beautiful dawn of the year is beginning, and before the birds have
reappeared one hears them coming. As from the summit of a tower lost in
the clear sky, one sees them, clouds of wings, swarms of swallows. They
are coming, they are crossing the seas. And already some of them are
singing in my heart.
Like every healthy being, Annette loved all the seasons. In adapting
herself to them, she shared in their secret energies. Those of the
springtime exalted her.
She went along, happy to be walking, happy to be working, carrying home
with her a wholesome fatigue and a hearty appetite. She was interested
in everything, filled with a new curiosity about the things of the mind
which for four years she had abandoned, about books, music; and
sometimes in the evening, although she was half dead, she would go out
and run to the other end of Paris to use a ticket to some concert.
Sylvie envied her; she herself was in the early stages of pregnancy, and
it was far from pleasant.
In her evening walks, Annette was followed more than once. She did not
notice this: absent-minded, dreaming, amused, she would suddenly stop in
the midst of her soliloquy with the feeling that she was dragging
something along at her heels. She would wake up and look curiously at
the thing that was whispering to her, shrug her shoulders or make a face
and start off briskly saying, "What an old idiot!"
The idiot was often young, and Annette thought, "In a dozen years Marc
may be like this."
She stopped indignantly. The false Marc received the wrath of the eyes
which she turned upon the other, and he did not persist. The eyes began
to laugh. The idea of seeing Marc in such a situation, a big handsome
boy, amused her in spite of everything. But her maternal pride was hurt.
She scolded herself for the observation she had made. Or rather she
scolded Marc.
"Young scamp!" she muttered. "When I get home I'll pull his ears." (She
did pull them.)
These little adventures entertained her. At first, that is. But when
they kept on. . . .
"Oh, what a pest! This is tiresome. Am I never to be allowed to walk in
peace any more? Because you look to the right, to the left, in the
simplest, most harmless way, because you laugh as you walk along, people
have to suspect you are thinking of love! I know love, I have seen
enough of it. The fools who imagine one can't get along without them! It
never occurs to them that one can be happy without them, just because
it's a fine day and one is young and has the little one needs. Let them
think what they like! Am I thinking of them? Of them! Haven't they ever
looked at themselves?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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