In controversy with the facile tongue-- That bloodless warfare of the old and young-- So seek your adversary to engage That on himself he shall exhaust his rage, And, like a snake that's fastened to the ground, With his own fangs inflict the fatal wound. You ask me how this miracle is done? Adopt his own opinions, one by one, And taunt him to refute them; in his wrath He 'll sweep them pitilessly from his path. Advance then gently all you wish to prove, Each proposition prefaced with, "As you 've So well remarked," or, "As you wisely say, And I cannot dispute," or, "By the way, This view of it which, better far expressed, Runs through your argument." Then leave the rest To him, secure that he 'll perform his trust And prove your views intelligent and just. Conmore Apel Brune. CONVENT, n. A place of retirement for women who wish for leisure to meditate upon the sin of idleness. CONVERSATION, n. A fair for the display of the minor mental commodities, each exhibitor being too intent upon the arrangement of his own wares to observe those of his neighbor. CORONATION, n. The ceremony of investing a sovereign with the outward and visible signs of his divine right to be blown skyhigh with a dynamite bomb. CORPORAL, n. A man who occupies the lowest rung of the military ladder. Fiercely the battle raged and, sad to tell, Our corporal heroically fell! Fame from her height looked down upon the brawl And said: "He had n't very far to fall." Giacomo Smith. CORPORATION, n. An ingenious device for securing individual profit without individual responsibility. CORSAIR, n. A politician of the seas. COURT FOOL, n. The plaintiff. COWARD, n. One who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs. CRAFT, n. A fool's substitute for brains. CRAYFISH, n. A small crustacean very much resembling the lobster, but less indigestible. In this small fish I take it that human wisdom is admirably figured and symbolized; for whereas the crayfish doth move only backward, and can have only retrospection, seeing naught but the perils already passed, so the wisdom of man doth not enable him to avoid the follies that beset his course, but only to apprehend their nature afterward.-- Sir James Merivale. CREDITOR, n. One of a tribe of savages dwelling beyond the Financial Straits and dreaded for their desolating incursions. CREMONA, n. A high-priced violin made in Connecticut. CRITIC, n. A person who boasts himself hard to please because nobody has ever tried to please him. There is a land of pure delight, Beyond the Jordan's flood, Where saints, apparelled all in white, Fling back the critic's mud. And as he legs it through the skies, His pelt a sable hue, He sorrows sore to recognize The missiles that he threw. G. J.