The Eternal Boy: Being the Story of the Prodigious HickeyJohnson, Owen
General
The Eternal Boy: Being the Story of the Prodigious Hickey
Johnson, Owen
Preparatory schools -- Fiction
Mr. Tapping did not like Hickey. He regarded him with suspicion, with
an instinctive recognition of an enemy. Also he was engaged in the
difficult expression of a certain letter which, at that time, presented
more difficulties than the binomial theorem. So he inquired with short
cordiality, concealing the written page under a blotter:
"Well, Hicks, what is it?"
"Please, Mr. Tapping," said Hickey, who had perceived the move with
malignant delight, "I wish you'd look at this problem,--it won't work
out." He added (shades of a thousand boys!), "I think there must be
some mistake in the book."
Now, the chief miseries of a young assistant master centre about the
study hours; when theory demands that he should be ready to advise and
instruct the discouraged boyish mind on any subject figuring in the
curriculum, whatever be his preference or his prejudice. Mr. Tapping,
who romped over the Greek and Latin page, had an hereditary weakness in
the mathematics, a failing that the boys had discovered and instantly
turned to their profit. He took the book, glanced at the problem and
began to jot down a line of figures. Hickey, meanwhile, with his back
to the door, brazenly extracted the loosened screw.
Finally, Mr. Tapping, becoming hopelessly entangled, raised his head
and said with a disdainful smile: "Hicks, I think you had better put a
little work on this--just a little work!"
"Mr. Tapping, I don't understand it," said Hickey, adding to himself,
"Old Tabby is up a tree!"
"Nonsense--perfectly easy, perfectly simple," said Tapping, returning
the book with a gesture of dismissal, "requires a little application,
Hicks, just a little application--that's all."
Hickey, putting on his most injured look, bowed to injustice and
departed at the moment that Turkey Reiter entered, seeking assistance
in French. Upon his tracks, without an interval, succeeded Macnooder
with a German composition, Hungry Smeed to discuss history, the
Egghead on a question of spelling, and Beauty Sawtelle in thirst for
information about the Middle Ages. Finally, Mr. Tapping's patience,
according to Macnooder's prophetic calculation, burst on a question of
biblical interpretation, and announcing wrathfully that he could no
longer be disturbed, he ushered out the last tormentor and shut the
door with violence.
Presently Hickey stole up on tiptoe and fastening a noose over the
knob, gave a signal. The string, pulled by a dozen equally responsible
hands, carried away the knob, which fell with a tiny crash and spun
in crazy circles on the floor. The fall of the inner useless knob was
heard on the inside of the door and the exclamation that burst from the
startled master. The tyrant was caged,--the house was at their pleasure!
Mr. Tapping committed the initial mistake of knocking twice imperiously
on the door and commanding, "Open at once."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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