The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and Fantasies — John Shaqi
The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and FantasiesZangwill, Israel
General
The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and Fantasies
Zangwill, Israel
Humorous stories; Jewish fiction; Jews -- England -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction
"Not have Sabbath-guests! No, no, I will not believe you are of the
sons of Belial, whose table is spread only for the rich, who do not
proclaim your equality with the poor even once a week. It is your fine
nature that would hide its benefactions. Do not I, Manasseh Bueno
Barzillai Azevedo da Costa, have at my Sabbath-table every week
Yankelé ben Yitzchok--a Pole? And if I have a Tedesco at my table, why
should I draw the line there? Why should I not permit you, a Tedesco,
to return the hospitality to me, a Sephardi? At six, then! I know your
house well--it is an elegant building that does credit to your
taste--do not be uneasy--I shall not fail to be punctual. _A Dios!_"
This time he waved his stick fraternally, and stalked down a turning.
For an instant Grobstock stood glued to the spot, crushed by a sense
of the inevitable. Then a horrible thought occurred to him.
[Illustration: "WAVED HIS STICK FRATERNALLY."]
Easy-going man as he was, he might put up with the visitation of
Manasseh. But then he had a wife, and, what was worse, a livery
servant. How could he expect a livery servant to tolerate such a
guest? He might fly from the town on Friday evening, but that would
necessitate troublesome explanations. And Manasseh would come again
the next Friday. That was certain. Manasseh would be like grim
death--his coming, though it might be postponed, was inevitable. Oh,
it was too terrible. At all costs he must revoke the invitation(?).
Placed between Scylla and Charybdis, between Manasseh and his
manservant, he felt he could sooner face the former.
"Da Costa!" he called in agony. "Da Costa!"
The _Schnorrer_ turned, and then Grobstock found he was mistaken in
imagining he preferred to face da Costa.
"You called me?" enquired the beggar.
"Ye--e--s," faltered the East India Director, and stood paralysed.
"What can I do for you?" said Manasseh graciously.
"Would you mind--very much--if I--if I asked you--"
"Not to come," was in his throat, but stuck there.
"If you asked me--" said Manasseh encouragingly.
"To accept some of my clothes," flashed Grobstock, with a sudden
inspiration. After all, Manasseh was a fine figure of a man. If he
could get him to doff those musty garments of his he might almost pass
him off as a prince of the blood, foreign by his beard--at any rate he
could be certain of making him acceptable to the livery servant. He
breathed freely again at this happy solution of the situation.
"Your cast-off clothes?" asked Manasseh. Grobstock was not sure
whether the tone was supercilious or eager. He hastened to explain.
"No, not quite that. Second-hand things I am still wearing. My old
clothes were already given away at Passover to Simeon the Psalms-man.
These are comparatively new."
"Then I would beg you to excuse me," said Manasseh, with a stately
wave of the bag.
"Oh, but why not?" murmured Grobstock, his blood running cold again.
"I cannot," said Manasseh, shaking his head.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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