Humorous stories, American; United States -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
“It is another temptation, Edward--I’m all in a tremble--but, oh, we’ve
escaped one temptation, and that ought to warn us, to--[“Six did I
hear?--thanks!--six fifty, six f--SEVEN hundred!”] And yet, Edward,
when you think--nobody susp--[“Eight hundred dollars!--hurrah!--make
it nine!--Mr. Parsons, did I hear you say--thanks!--nine!--this noble
sack of virgin lead going at only nine hundred dollars, gilding and
all--come! do I hear--a thousand!--gratefully yours!--did some one say
eleven?--a sack which is going to be the most celebrated in the whole
Uni--”] “Oh, Edward” (beginning to sob), “we are so poor!--but--but--do
as you think best--do as you think best.”
Edward fell--that is, he sat still; sat with a conscience which was not
satisfied, but which was overpowered by circumstances.
Meantime a stranger, who looked like an amateur detective gotten
up as an impossible English earl, had been watching the evening’s
proceedings with manifest interest, and with a contented expression in
his face; and he had been privately commenting to himself. He was now
soliloquising somewhat like this: “None of the Eighteen are bidding;
that is not satisfactory; I must change that--the dramatic unities
require it; they must buy the sack they tried to steal; they must pay
a heavy price, too--some of them are rich. And another thing, when I
make a mistake in Hadleyburg nature the man that puts that error upon
me is entitled to a high honorarium, and some one must pay. This poor
old Richards has brought my judgment to shame; he is an honest man:--I
don’t understand it, but I acknowledge it. Yes, he saw my deuces--_and_
with a straight flush, and by rights the pot is his. And it shall be
a jack-pot, too, if I can manage it. He disappointed me, but let that
pass.”
He was watching the bidding. At a thousand, the market broke: the
prices tumbled swiftly. He waited--and still watched. One competitor
dropped out; then another, and another. He put in a bid or two now.
When the bids had sunk to ten dollars, he added a five; some one raised
him a three; he waited a moment, then flung in a fifty-dollar jump,
and the sack was his--at $1,282. The house broke out in cheers--then
stopped; for he was on his feet, and had lifted his hand. He began to
speak.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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