The Master of Mrs. Chilvers: An Improbable Comedy — John Shaqi
The Master of Mrs. Chilvers: An Improbable ComedyJerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
General
The Master of Mrs. Chilvers: An Improbable Comedy
Jerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
England -- Drama
GEOFFREY. Exactly. You think man’s job more interesting than your own.
ANNYS. (_After a moment_.) Who told you that it was a man’s job?
GEOFFREY. Well. (_He shrugs his shoulders_.) We can’t do yours.
ANNYS. Can’t we help each other?
GEOFFREY. As, for instance, in this election! (_He gives a short
laugh_.)
ANNYS. Of course, this is an exceptional case.
GEOFFREY. It’s an epitome of the whole question. You are trying to take
my job away from me. To the neglect of your own.
ANNYS. (_After another moment’s silence_.) Haven’t I always tried to do
my duty?
GEOFFREY. I have thought so.
ANNYS. Oh, my dear, we mustn’t quarrel. You will win this election. I
want you to win it. Next time we must fight side by side again.
GEOFFREY. Don’t you see? Fighting you means fighting the whole
movement. (_He indicates the posters pinned to the walls_.) That sort
of thing.
ANNYS. (_After a brief inspection_.) Not that way. (_Shaking her
head_.) It would break my heart for you to turn against us. Win because
you are the better man. (_Smiling_.) I want you to be the better man.
GEOFFREY. I would rather be your husband.
ANNYS. (_Smiling_.) Isn’t that the same thing?
GEOFFREY. No. I want a wife.
ANNYS. What precisely do you mean by “wife”?
GEOFFREY. It’s an old-established word.
(MRS. CHINN _has entered to complete the tea arrangements_. _She is
arranging the table_.)
MRS. CHINN. There’s a deputation downstairs, sir, just come for you.
GEOFFREY. What are they?
MRS. CHINN. It’s one of those societies for the reform of something.
They said you were expecting them.
SIGSBY. (_Breaking away from the group by the window_.) Quite right.
(_Looks at his watch_.) Five o’clock, I’ll bring them up.
GEOFFREY. Happen to know what it is they want to reform?
SIGSBY. (_By door_.) Laws relating to the physical relationship between
the sexes, I think.
GEOFFREY. Oh, only that!
SIGSBY. Something of the sort.
(_He goes out_. MRS. CHINN _also by the other door_.)
GEOFFREY. (_Rising_.) Will you pour out?
ANNYS. (_She has been thinking_. _She comes back to the present_.) We
shan’t be in your way?
GEOFFREY. Oh, no. It will make it easier to get rid of them.
(ANNYS _changes her chair_. _The others gather round_. _The service
and drinking of tea proceeds in the usual course_.)
(_To_ ELIZABETH.) You’ll take some tea?
ELIZABETH. Thank you.
GEOFFREY. You must be enjoying yourself just now.
ELIZABETH. (_Makes a moue_.) They insist on my being agreeable.
ANNYS. It’s so good for her. Teaches her self-control.
LAMB. I gather from Mrs. Spender, that in the perfect world there will
be no men at all.
ELIZABETH. Oh, yes, they will be there. But in their proper place.
ST. HERBERT. That’s why you didn’t notice them.
(_The_ DEPUTATION _reaches the door_. _The sound of voices is heard_.)
PHOEBE. She’s getting on very well. If she isn’t careful, she’ll end up
by being a flirt.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account