French fiction -- 20th century -- Translations into English
Just as the gracious Ygrées pair passed by, Hans placed his colossal
buttocks on a bench which, bearing already the weight of some twenty
huge men and women, cracked disconsolately. The drinkers fell, their
legs in the air. Some bare thighs could be seen because Munich ladies
never wear their stockings above their knees. Bursts of laughter
everywhere. Hans Irlbeck who had also been floored, but had not let go
of his stein, spilled its contents over the belly of a girl who had
rolled near him, and the beer bubbling under her resembled that which
she did when she got to her feet after swallowing a quart at one gulp in
order to recover her composure.
But the proprietor of the garden cried:
"_Donnerkeil!_ damned swine ... a bench broken."
And he started off with his towel under his arm, calling loudly for the
waiters:
"Franz! Jacob! Ludwig! Martin!" while the patrons called for the
proprietor:
"_Ober! Ober!_"
However the Oberkellner and the waiters did not come back. The drinkers
crowded about the counters and took their steins themselves, but the
kegs were no longer emptied, and no more were heard the sonorous blows
of another cask being put under the hammer. The singing ceased, the
drinkers, angered, proffered oaths at the brewers and at the March beer
itself. Some profited by the lull to vomit with violent efforts, their
eyes almost popping out of their heads; their neighbors encouraged them
with imperturbable seriousness. Hans Irlbeck who had picked himself up,
not without difficulty, grumbled with a great snort:
"There is no more beer in Munich!"
And he repeated, with the accent of his native city:
"Minchen! Minchen! Minchen!"
After raising his eyes toward heaven, he fell upon a vendor of fowls,
and having ordered him to roast a goose for him, began to formulate his
desires:
"No more beer in Munich... if there were only some white radishes!"
And he repeated many times the Munich expression:
"Raadi, raadi, raadi..."
Suddenly he stopped. The crowd of drinkers, beside themselves, gave a
cry of exultation. The four waiters had just appeared at the door of the
brewery. With dignity they were carrying a sort of canopy under which
the Oberkellner marched proud and erect, like a negro king dethroned.
Behind him came fresh kegs of beer which were put under the hammer at
the sound of the bell, while shouts of laughter rang out, and cries and
songs rose above this teeming butte, hard and agitated as the Adam's
apple of Gambrinus himself, when, burlesqued in the costume of a monk, a
white radish in one hand, he tossed off with the other the jug which
rejoiced his gullet.
And the unborn child found himself right shaken by the laughter of
Macarée who, greatly amused by the spectacle of this colossal gluttony,
drank and drank in company with her spouse.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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