TRUEMAN. To tell you what is Latin for Constitution, will not make you a particle the wiser; I will, therefore, explain it in the vernacular tongue.--Constitution then, in its primary, abstract, and true signification, is a concatenation or coacervation of simple, distinct parts, of various qualities or properties, united, compounded, or constituted in such a manner, as to form or compose a system or body, when viewed in its aggregate or general nature. In its common, or generally received, acceptation, it implies two things.--First, the nature, habit, disposition, organization or construction of the natural, corporeal, or animal system.--Secondly, a political system, or plan of government. This last definition, I apprehend, explains the Constitution you mean. HUMPHRY. Like enough, but I don't understand a single word you've been a talking about. TRUEMAN. No! 'Tis not my fault then:--If plainness of language, clearness of description, and a grammatical arrangement of words will not suffice, I can do no more. _Enter OLD LOVEYET listening._ HUMPHRY. I mean the Constitution that you read in the newspapers about; that that your worship was a going to get at loggerheads with old Mr. What's-his-name, about. LOVEYET. I'll old you, you rascal! TRUEMAN. Did you never hear your friends in the country talk of the new Constitution? HUMPHRY. Not I, I never heard anybody talk about it, at the Pharisee's Head;--I don't believe Jeremy Stave, the clark of the meeting-house, no, nor Parson Thumpum himself ever heard of such a word--No, not even old Mr. Scourge, the Schoolmaster. TRUEMAN. A hopeful genius, for a Schoolmaster, upon my education. Do you send him to me,--I'll qualify him for that important station. HUMPHRY. And I'll be qualify'd I never larnt such a word when I went to his school. TRUEMAN. Nor any other one, I believe, properly speaking. HUMPHRY. Oh yes, I'll say that for him;--he us'd to take a great deal of pains for to larn us proper speaking. TRUEMAN. The Constitution you hear so much noise about, is a new government, which some great and good men have lately contrived, and now recommend for the welfare and happiness of the American nation. LOVEYET. Oh, the traitor! HUMPHRY. But didn't old Mr. What's-his-name say, how they wanted for to make slaves of us? LOVEYET. There's _old_ Mr. What's-his-name, again. TRUEMAN. Mr. Loveyet is a weak man;--you must not mind what he says. LOVEYET. Oh, I shall burst! TRUEMAN. Only think now of his sending me a challenge, because I told him he was sixty odd years of-- LOVEYET. [_Running towards them._] Death and the devil! Have I sent you a challenge? HUMPHRY. No, not you, old gentleman. LOVEYET. I'll give you _old_ gentleman.--Take that, for calling me old again. [_Offers to strike him; but missing his blow, he falls down._] Oh, what an unlucky dog I am! My evil genius is certainly let loose today.