The Pot Boiler: A Comedy in Four Acts — John Shaqi
The Pot Boiler: A Comedy in Four ActsSinclair, Upton
General
The Pot Boiler: A Comedy in Four Acts
Sinclair, Upton
Comedy plays
_Peggy (As Bill tosses and calls aloud in his sleep, goes to his
bed, kneels and soothes him)._ Oh, my baby! My baby! You're not
going to be sick! No, no, I can't stand that! Anything but that!
I'll have to give it up! Will must give up trying to be a writer,
and get some sort of paying job. Or I'll have to go on the stage
again, and earn some real money----_(Hearing Will returning, she
leaps up and runs Left.)_ Was it the check?
_Will (enters)._ Yes.
_Peggy._ For how much?
_Will (in a voice of agony)._ _Guess_ how much?
_Peggy._ Tell me!
_Will._ Two-fifty.
_Peggy._ Two-fifty!
_Will._ Two dollars and a half!
_Peggy._ Great God!
_Will (furiously)._ How do they expect a poet to live on two dollars
and a half for a poem?
_Peggy (hysterically)._ They don't expect poets to live! They don't
care anything about poets! Poets are cheap!
_Will (catches her by the arm, stares at her)._ Peggy! Peggy! This
play has got to succeed! It's got to succeed! People have got to
like it!
_Peggy._ Oh, Will. I hope they like it! I could get them by the
throats and choke them until they promise to like it! I could fall
down upon my knees and beg them to like it! _(To audience, with
intensity.)_ _Don't_ you like it? Don't you like it? Tell us that
you like it! Tell us!
CURTAIN.
ACT IV.
_(SCENE--The attic, the following afternoon. Scene of the Play-play
is the drawing room, as in Act I.)_
_At rise: The Real-play, showing Will busy working on his Mss.,
Left. Peggy Right, putting Bill to sleep._
_Peggy._ Now, Mr. Bill, you're going to have a nice nap.
_Bill._ I feel better.
_Peggy._ I'm so glad to hear it. And Will's most through with his
play, and then he'll take you to the park.
_Bill._ Say, Peggy!
_Peggy._ Now, go to sleep.
_Bill._ But say!
_Peggy._ Well?
_Bill._ I think I'm hungry.
_Peggy._ There's nothing in the house, dear.
_Bill._ No bread, Peggy?
_Peggy._ No, but we'll get some when you wake up. _(Goes Left and
sits by Will. Silence, while he works over papers. He is pale and
haggard; she watches him anxiously.)_
_Will. (Leans on hands.)_ Oh, dear.
_Peggy._ Tired, Will?
_Will._ I'm getting a beastly headache.
_Peggy._ Will, you know you oughtn't to work when your stomach has
quit like this.
_Will._ Hang my stomach!
_Peggy._ But, dear--
_Will._ Why do authors have to have stomachs? They're never of any
use.
_Peggy._ Listen, Will. You can't do good work when you're so tired.
_Will._ I can do good work! You'll see it's good. I've nearly
finished the fourth act now. Come, read it--and forget about my
stomach. _(She moves over to him. The Play-play begins to appear.)_
The scene is Dad's drawing-room again. Jessie is there; she's
worrying about Jack, and Bob is trying to comfort her. _(Full light
on Play-play.)_
_Bob._ He's all right, Jessie. Anybody'd think he'd gone to war!
_Jessie._ He was never away for so long before.
_Bob._ Don't I seem a fairly healthy specimen, Jessie?
_Jessie._ I suppose so, Bob.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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