Humorous stories, English; Men -- Societies and clubs -- Fiction; Short stories, English
‘Why?’ exclaimed the Major. ‘Because it’s one of the best-known
quotations in Shakespeare. I won’t swear which play it comes from,
but everybody knows it. Let’s see, how does it go? “The quality
of mercy is not strained, but droppeth like the thingamy of the
something-or-other.”’
‘Any defence, Jimmy?’ asked the chairman.
‘Somewhat,’ said Jimmy. ‘I said, “The quality of mercy.” I admit it. I
glory in it. But that’s only four words, and it’s laid down that four
words do not make a quotation.’
‘That is so. I fear that the Major, Dr Alden, our only K.C., and our
two artist-members must all have a minus one recorded against them.’
‘What I was going to have said when they interrupted me was that the
quality of mercy differed in some material respects from coffee that
has been made with a percolator. Same thought as Shakey’s, but a
different mode of expression. Five of you have now lost a life through
being premature. You need to be careful. A score of minus three puts
you outside of any chance of two hundred and twenty of the very best.
And I’m dangerous to-night—I’m out for blood. The brindled cat winds
slowly o’er the lea—anybody like to challenge that?’
Wildersley said it would make a good title for an Academy picture, but
nobody asserted that it was Shakespeare—not even Jimmy.
‘You’re an unenterprising lot,’ said Jimmy disdainfully. ‘But I’ll
give you one more chance. “Satiate at length, and heightened as with
wine.” That’s more than four words. Any challengers?’
‘Yes,’ said Sir Charles, holding up his hand. ‘I don’t know for
certain, but it’s got the flavour of the period in it. Anyway, I’d
sooner lose one life than let you score a triumphant two for it.’
‘Then you’ll lose the life. It’s a quotation all right, but it happens
to be a little bit that I cut out of the best end of _Paradise Lost_,
by J. Milton, Esquire.’ And Jimmy leant back in his chair satisfied.
He had scored nothing for himself, but he had done something to spoil
the chances of six other men.
The chairman turned to Sir Charles. ‘Don’t you think that Jimmy’s an
irreverent young blackguard?’ he asked.
‘Well,’ said Sir Charles, with an air of quiet dignity. ‘Jimmy is
young and I am old. As we progress on life’s journey, we old men cease
to expect to find universal agreement with our views. We know that our
opinions are our own, but cannot be all the world’s.’ He paused and
sighed. ‘A stage or two farther on, and Jimmy may come to think, as I
do now, that——’ And here suddenly Sir Charles broke off and chuckled.
‘Well, I’m blest!’ he said. ‘I never expected to do it. I knew this
wasn’t a little nest of Shakespeareans, but I did think that you’d
spot the best-known line in Shakespeare.’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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