Humorous stories, English; Men -- Societies and clubs -- Fiction; Short stories, English
‘Don’t they put no notice-board up with the name of the firm on?’
‘They will, of course, as soon as the actual work begins. I have their
card.’ This printed card had been one of Jimmy’s properties. The
policeman slipped it into his pocket.
‘I’ve no doubt it’s all right,’ said the policeman, ‘but I’ll just
show this card to make sure.’
‘Certainly,’ said Jimmy; ‘that’s the thing to do. You’ll find they
know all about it up at the station.’
The game was up. As soon as the policeman was round the corner Jimmy
dashed off to fetch the taxi while Hesseltine completed the work of
filling in the hole and getting their various properties together.
They had at least the satisfaction of getting clear away before the
policeman returned.
The chairman, when he had heard the story, said that if everybody had
their rights it was probable that two of the younger members of the
Problem Club would now be in prison, but he would allow them a score
of five all the same. The fifth score might seem a little doubtful,
but the young policeman has said that he believed it was all right,
and if he had not would probably have taken stronger measures. The
chairman also refused to admit Quillian’s objection that the
conspirators had been mistaken for imaginary people. People might be
real or imaginary, and the subtle editor of _The Pig-Keepers’ Friend_
had not indicated that either meaning was excluded. A further protest
by Major Byles and Mr Matthews against the scandalous use that had
been made of their names for the firm of sanitary engineers was not
taken seriously.
But the Major may have been embittered by the completeness of his own
failure. With the help of a gray wig and beard and some shabby
clothes, he had intended to call at six different back-doors and to
represent in succession six different people—a beggar, a
fortune-teller, a vendor of cheap jewellery, and so forth. But the
first back-door at which he called was his own, and there he was
immediately recognised by a house-dog and by his own kitchen-maid. His
subsequent explanation that he had merely been doing it for a bet had
not been well received. He did not give details, but it was gathered
that Mrs Byles had had a good deal to say on the subject.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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