English drama -- Early modern and Elizabethan, 1500-1600; Shakespeare, William, 1564-1616 -- Spurious and doubtful works
PYE.
We will attend his worship.—Worship, I think, for so much
the Posts at his door should signify, and the fair coming
in, and the wicket; else I neither knew him nor his worship,
but ’tis happiness he is within doors, what so ere he be;
if he be not too much a formal Citizen, he may do me good.—
Sergeant and Yeoman, how do you like this house? ist not
most wholesomely plotted?
RAVEN.
Troth, prisoner, an exceeding fine house.
PYE.
Yet I wonder how he should forget me,—for he ne’er knew
me.—No matter, what is forgot in you will be remembered
in your Master. A pretty comfortable room this, me thinks:
You have no such rooms in prison now?
PUT.
Oh, dog-holes toote.
PYE.
Dog-holes, indeed. I can tell you, I have great hope to
have my Chamber here shortly, nay, and diet too, for he’s
the most free-heartedst Gentleman where he takes: you would
little think it! and what a fine Gallery were here for me to
walk and study, and make verses.
PUT.
O, it stands very pleasantly for a Scholar.
[Enter Gentleman.]
PYE.
Look what maps, and pictures, and devices, and things:
neatly, delicately—mass, here he comes: he should be a
Gentleman; I like his Beard well.—All happiness to your
worship.
GENTLEMAN.
You’re kindly welcome, sir.
PUT.
A simple salutation.
RAVEN.
Mass, it seems the Gentleman makes great account of him.
PYE.
I have the thing here for you, sir. I beseech you conceal
me, sir, I’m undone else,—I have the Mask here for you,
sir, Look you, sir.—I beseech your worship first to pardon
my rudeness, for my extremes makes me bolder than I would
be. I am a poor Gentleman and a Scholar, and now most
unfortunately fallen into the Fangs of unmerciful officers,
arrested for debt, which tho small, I am not able to
compass, by reason I’m destitute of lands, money, and
friends; so that if I fall into the hungry swallow of the
prison, I am like utterly to perish, and with fees and
extortions be pincht clean to the bone. Now, if ever pity
had interest in the blood of a Gentleman, I beseech you
vouchsafe but to favour that means of my escape, which I
have already thought upon.
GENTLEMAN.
Go forward.
PUT.
I warrant he likes it rarely.
PYE.
In the plundge of my extremities, being giddy, and doubtful
what to do, at least it was put into my labouring thoughts,
to make happy use of this paper; and to blear their unlettered
eyes, I told them there was a Device for a Mask drawn int’,
and that (but for their interception,) I was going to a
Gentleman to receive my reward for’t: they, greedy at this
word, and hoping to make purchase of me, offered their
attendance, to go along with me. My hap was to make bold
with your door, Sir, which my thoughts showed me the most
fairest and comfortablest entrance, and I hope I have
happened right upon understanding and pity: may it please
your good Worship, then, but to uphold my Device, which is
to let one of your men put me out at back-door, and I shall
be bound to your worship for ever.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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