Domestic fiction; Family -- England -- Midlands -- Fiction; Midlands (England) -- Fiction
He opened the doors, upper and lower, and they entered into the high,
dry barn, that smelled warm even if it were not warm. He hung the
lantern on the nail and shut the door. They were in another world now.
The light shed softly on the timbered barn, on the whitewashed walls,
and the great heap of hay; instruments cast their shadows largely, a
ladder rose to the dark arch of a loft. Outside there was the driving
rain, inside, the softly-illuminated stillness and calmness of the
barn.
Holding the child on one arm, he set about preparing the food for the
cows, filling a pan with chopped hay and brewer’s grains and a little
meal. The child, all wonder, watched what he did. A new being was
created in her for the new conditions. Sometimes, a little spasm,
eddying from the bygone storm of sobbing, shook her small body. Her
eyes were wide and wondering, pathetic. She was silent, quite still.
In a sort of dream, his heart sunk to the bottom, leaving the surface
of him still, quite still, he rose with the panful of food, carefully
balancing the child on one arm, the pan in the other hand. The silky
fringe of the shawl swayed softly, grains and hay trickled to the
floor; he went along a dimly-lit passage behind the mangers, where the
horns of the cows pricked out of the obscurity. The child shrank, he
balanced stiffly, rested the pan on the manger wall, and tipped out the
food, half to this cow, half to the next. There was a noise of chains
running, as the cows lifted or dropped their heads sharply; then a
contented, soothing sound, a long snuffing as the beasts ate in
silence.
The journey had to be performed several times. There was the rhythmic
sound of the shovel in the barn, then the man returned walking stiffly
between the two weights, the face of the child peering out from the
shawl. Then the next time, as he stooped, she freed her arm and put it
round his neck, clinging soft and warm, making all easier.
The beasts fed, he dropped the pan and sat down on a box, to arrange
the child.
“Will the cows go to sleep now?” she said, catching her breath as she
spoke.
“Yes.”
“Will they eat all their stuff up first?”
“Yes. Hark at them.”
And the two sat still listening to the snuffing and breathing of cows
feeding in the sheds communicating with this small barn. The lantern
shed a soft, steady light from one wall. All outside was still in the
rain. He looked down at the silky folds of the paisley shawl. It
reminded him of his mother. She used to go to church in it. He was back
again in the old irresponsibility and security, a boy at home.
The two sat very quiet. His mind, in a sort of trance, seemed to become
more and more vague. He held the child close to him. A quivering little
shudder, re-echoing from her sobbing, went down her limbs. He held her
closer. Gradually she relaxed, the eyelids began to sink over her dark,
watchful eyes. As she sank to sleep, his mind became blank.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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