TO THE SURGEON. I congratulate you upon your recent emancipation from incessant study, intense application, and strict _hospital_ attendance, where I shall willingly suppose, you was a _dresser_ of the most promising abilities; that you excelled your cotemporaries in every _chirurgical_ opinion, became an expert _dissecting_ pupil to one of the _court of examiners_, and are now burst through the cloud of your original obscurity, a perfect prodigy of _anatomical_ disquisition. I naturally conclude you capable of animadverting upon all the distinct branches of your art to admiration, that you are critically excellent in the use of an _instrument_ from the humble act of simple _phlebotomy_, to the more important operation for a _fistula in ano_.—You have, beyond every shadow of doubt, paid proper attention to the fashionable precepts of the late Lord Chesterfield, and rendered yourself (with assistance from the graces) a perfect adept in polite address, displaying a variety of the most engaging attitudes, even in the adjustment of a _ten tailed bandage_. The professional information you have industriously collected, is such as will certainly afford you the most equitable claims upon _public opinion_, being in possession of every necessary acquisition from a _simple gonorrhœa_ to a _confirmed lues_. Previous to your solicitation of favour from your friends, you have necessarily passed the awful ceremony of examination at the _Old Bailey_, under your former tutor (and his brethren of the court) who would not pay his _own abilities_ so improper a compliment as to ask you questions in _anatomy_ or _osteology_, that he knew your qualifications inadequate to the task of technically explaining. After passing this _fiery ordeal_, you deposit the usual _pecuniary gratuity_, and receiving the _badge_ of your newly acquired _honor_, we now hail you “_a Member of the Corporation of Surgeons_,” and conclude an ornamental plate upon the door of your habitation denotes you so accordingly.