"If you only knew how I longed to take you in my arms, and keep you
there. But what's the good of longing?"
"You can take me in your arms--and keep me there--for about ten
seconds."
"Yes, I know; I know that you're a darling, the sweetest girl in the
world, but what right have I to do it? What prospect have I of ever
making you my wife? All debts, and nothing to pay them. What would your
uncle say if he came upon us now? Wouldn't he warn me off the premises,
as my brother has done? You know, my dear, you're not for such as I am.
I don't want to say anything unkind, but don't you see, can't you see,
that the only thing left for me to do is to withdraw and leave the
field open for a better man?"
"Sydney, this time you must have come a cropper."
There was that in the girl's tone which, in spite of himself, brought a
real smile to the young man's lips.
"I have. You're right. One which is going to make an end of me."
The girl shook her head gaily.
"Oh, no, it won't. I know you better. You've been coming croppers ever
since I have known you, and that's all my life, some of them awful
croppers; there must have been quite twenty from which you were never
going to rise again. But you've managed, and you'll manage again. Only,
really, I do wish you'd get out of the habit, if only for a while."
"Vi, you don't understand, this time you really don't. I'm done. I went
to my brother as a last resource--you may be pretty sure it was a last
resource--for the money which was the only thing that could save me. I
am quite serious. He told me he would not give me so much as a
sovereign; he even refused me a night's lodging. That means, as I tell
you, that I'm done. I don't know quite what will happen to me, but
something not pretty. When you and I meet again it is quite possible it
will not be as equals; I shall be in a class of which you do not take
social cognisance."
Again the young lady shook her head; if again it was with an attempt at
gaiety, there was something which looked very much like tears in her
eyes.
"What a cropper you must have come; it makes my blood run cold to hear
you talking. Have you been robbing a bank?"
"I might as well have done. I'm likely to be in as awkward a position
as if I had."
The girl looked at him steadily; his eyes met hers. Each might have
been looking into the other's soul.
"Sydney, do you still love me?"
"Wouldn't it be better for you if I were to tell you straight out that
I don't? Think, wouldn't it?"
"No, it wouldn't; it would be much worse. It would be a cowardly thing
to say, and also, I happen to know, an untrue one. I know that you do
still love me. I only asked you for the sake of hearing your answer.
You do."
"It has become a habit."
"And habits are not things which are easily rooted up."
"So it would seem."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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