WOOD. (_aside_) What does she mean by "poor thing?" MRS. L. So I took the express train, and here I am! I suppose she was dreadfully agitated, poor thing? WOOD. (_aside_) That's _two_ poor things! (_aloud_) Agitated! not she; she was all animation--all joy--all---- MRS. L. Yes, yes! she naturally would be _at first_, poor thing. WOOD. (_aside_) Another "poor thing," and Mrs. Larkings and I shall have a row. MRS. L. Well, as I have unluckily arrived too late to witness the ceremony--I'd have given anything to have seen you--ha, ha! (_laughing immoderately_) You don't mind my laughing, do you? WOOD. Not at all; it's rather pleasant than otherwise! MRS. L. All I can do is to give the bride and bridegroom my blessing, and go back by the next train to London! WOOD. And to Larkings! By-the-bye, how is your Christopher? I hope your Christopher is still the same fond, indulgent Christopher you've always found your Christopher. MRS. L. (_enthusiastically_) He's a darling! we are happy as the day is long! and no wonder--we married for love; our tastes, our opinions are the same, and what is still more important, we are nearly the same age--Christopher is twenty-four; I am twenty-two! now between you and Caroline the gap is much wider. WOOD. The what? MRS. L. The gap! _she_ is under twenty, while you are--how old shall we say? (_smiling_) WOOD. (_very quietly_) Thirty-nine! MRS. L. Oh, that's the age you've decided on, eh? well, if you wish it, we'll say thirty-nine! (_smiling again_) I'd better tell Christopher in case he might let the cat out of the bag! (_smiling_) WOOD. (_aside_) Pleasant creature! very! (_aloud_) Yes, Mrs. Larkings--and _at_ thirty-nine I think it time for a man to marry. MRS. L. Then why didn't you? (_smiling_) WOOD. I _am_, married! at least, such is my impression. MRS. L. Yes, yes! but I don't mean _this_ thirty-nine! your other thirty-nine! your _first_ thirty-nine! (_smiling_) WOOD. (_aside_) Her sex protects her. (_aloud_) I repeat that having reached the age of thirty-nine, and having moreover, sufficiently enjoyed what is called "life"---- MRS. L. You determined to marry and settle down quietly, and all that sort of thing--exactly! that's intelligible enough, as far as you are concerned; but--your wife? WOOD. My wife? Well? what? MRS. L. She _hasn't_ enjoyed what is called "life." WOOD. Eh? no--of course not; but---- MRS. L. You intend that she _shall!_ of course! indeed, Mrs. Colonel Carver writes me word that she has arranged a delightful wedding trip for you. WOOD. Has she? (_aside_) That's kind of Carver! very! MRS. L. Yes! Brussels, Switzerland, Italy, &c., &c., &c.; she hasn't quite settled which. WOOD. Hasn't she? to tell you the truth no more have I. (_aside_) I shall seize the earliest opportunity of giving Carver notice to quit. MRS. L. With a young and blooming bride for a companion, how delightful it will be! The Alps! Mount Vesuvius! the Colosseum at Rome!----