Fantasy fiction; Science fiction; Subconsciousness -- Fiction
"Yes. It was just lovely," Miss Quirtt agreed. "Much better than the
job I did on old Mr. Grant. He didn't leave me any reference at
all, and I had to write it myself. How I hate forgery! Of course, it
may not have been entirely his fault. After all, they did rush him
something awful when they came to take him away to the asylum." A
dreamy reminiscent look came into her eyes. "The job with Mr. Forbes
was much better. He said some very nice things about me before he left
for prison. I was the last one he said goodbye to."
Marc shuddered. "A very impressive career," he said, "but you can't
get away with it this time. I know that it was you that stole my brief
case."
"Yes," Miss Quirtt answered promptly. "And that's why I'm going to have
to make corpses of you ... so you can't talk, you know. It's really
not my way of doing things, but I suppose that everyone has to make
exceptions occasionally." She turned to Toffee and smiled. "I'm sorry
to have to put you out of the way, dear, but you understand, I'm sure."
"Oh, perfectly," Toffee said helpfully, returning the smile.
Marc was beginning to wonder just how many of them were crazy, and in
what combination. Even Toffee was making less sense than usual.
"And if I do say so, myself," Toffee continued. "Marc and I will make
lovely corpses."
"Oh, indeed you will!" Miss Quirtt agreed enthusiastically. "Some of
the nicest I've ever seen. And you'll be the very first ones that I've
made all by myself. I'll be very proud of you."
"That's nice to know," Toffee said, "but you're not going to use that
gun are you?"
"Why not?"
"It won't work," Toffee said simply. "You'd better think of something
else."
Miss Quirtt looked at her suspiciously. "What do you mean, it won't
work?"
"We hate to admit it, and we wouldn't to anyone else," Toffee said,
"but Marc and I are a little odd in some ways. Guns don't faze us. In
fact, there's very little that does. If you doubt me, shoot me, and see
for yourself."
Marc's mouth started open in alarm, but closed again as Toffee winked
at him.
Apparently Miss Quirtt was as open to suggestions as was Miss Ruby
Marlow. "All right," she said agreeably, a shrewd look coming into her
eyes. "Just stand over there."
* * * * *
Toffee followed her directions, and took her place before the wall, and
near Marc, where Miss Quirtt could keep them both covered during the
experiment. "Be sure you fire close up," she said. "I wouldn't want you
to miss."
"Don't worry," Miss Quirtt said menacingly, leveling the gun at Toffee.
"I won't." She squinted down the barrel, her eyes really crossing this
time, and pressed the trigger.
There was a sudden flash of white light, and an explosion. A crack
etched it's way crazily through the plaster just behind Toffee, but
Toffee, herself, remained just as she had been, a composed, smiling
figure in a scandalous black evening gown.
"You see?" she said. "You'll just have to think of something else."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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