A Maid and a Million Men: the candid confessions of Leona Canwick, censored indiscreetly by James G. Dunton — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
A Maid and a Million Men: the candid confessions of Leona Canwick, censored indiscreetly by James G. Dunton
John Stuart Mill · en
Life rolled away in its customary monotony and gradually the curtains of
our horizon were drawn back to reveal new interests and new hopes. Leon
and I seemed to grow more similar in appearance and more dissimilar in
nature as we grew up. Aunt Elinor used to say that our sexes were all
mixed up, that our natures were diametrically opposite to our respective
physiques, and for once she was really near the truth, since I was very
much of a tomboy while Leon was an ethereal-spirited, effeminate, poetic
soul who cringed from all physical matters and even resented having to
be near my dog Esky, who worshiped the very ground I walked on and
evinced not uncertainly his suspicions of people who were too nasty nice
to play with a pup now and then. Leon wasted no love on Esky and once
declared that the pup’s mother must have been promiscuous. Well, Esky
was nothing but a mongrel, to be sure, although Aunt Elinor said his
mother was a thoroughbred Eskimo dog, but even thoroughbreds have been
known to have cuckold husbands; mongrel or not, a dog instinctively
attaches himself to the man of the house—but not so with Esky. He
hadn’t any use for Leon at all, probably because Leon high-hatted him,
whereas I liked nothing better than a chance to romp and wrestle with
him.
You can readily understand how I looked upon my sweet brother. He did
none of the things that regular boys do. Sports and games and any kind
of exercise that was the least bit rough did not appeal to him at all. I
even suspected that he was too damned nice to be interested in
girls—but on this point I was mistaken, for I discovered that Vyvy
Martin, one of Wakeham’s deep-eyed débutante beauties, was more or less
Leon’s soul mate. One was about as dizzy as the other, so they made a
perfect couple, entirely sufficient unto themselves—a condition which
must, I suppose, be called Love. But you can imagine how I looked upon
Leon when every impulse in me was toward the very kind of living which
he shunned. It seemed that not a day went by without my wishing I were
in his shoes so that I could chase off and enjoy myself as he should
enjoy himself. Truly in mental and emotional equipment, we were as
dissimilar as Tom Thumb and the Fat Lady.