Two darkies had bought a mess of pork in partnership, but Sam having no place to put his portion in, consented to trust the whole to Julius' keeping. The next morning they met, when Sam says--"Good mornin', Julius, anything happen strange or mysterious down in your vicinity lately?" "Yaas, Sam, most a strange thing happen at my house yesterlast night--all mystery, all mystery to me." "Ah, Julius, what was dat?" "Well, Sam, I tole you now. Dis morning I went down into the cellar for to get a piece of hog for dis darky's breakfast, and I put my hand down in de brine and felt all round, but no pork dere--all gone. Codn't tell what bewent with it, so I turned up de bar'l, and Sam, true as preachin', de rats had eat a hole clar froo de bottom of de bar'l, and dragged de pork all out!" Sam was petrified with astonishment, but presently said--"Why didn't de brine run out of the same hole?" "Ah, Sam, dat's de mystery." OUR BOB.--380. Judge S---- had a very wild son, named Bob, who was constantly on a spree, and upon being brought up once before the court for drunkenness, the judge cried out--"Is that _our_ Bob?" _Clerk_: "Yes, sir." _Judge_: "Fine the rascal two dollars and costs; I'd make it ten dollars, if I didn't know it would come out of my own pocket." SAMBO'S SUSPICION.--381. A gentleman who holds a responsible position under Government concluded to change his lodgings. He sent one of the waiters of the hotel where he had selected apartments after his baggage. Meeting the waiter an hour or two afterwards, he said--"Well, Sambo, did you bring my baggage down?" "No, sah!" blandly responded the sable gentleman. "Why, what was the reason?" "Case, sah, the gentleman in de office said you had not paid your bill." "Not paid my bill! why, that's singular--he knew me very well when he kept the Girard House, in Philadelphia." "Well, mebbe," rejoined Sambo, thoughtfully scratching his head, "_dat was de reason he wouldn't gib me de baggage_." WHERE THE DUCKS WENT.--382. A man was brought into one of the New York courts on the charge of having stolen some ducks from a farmer. "How do you know they are your ducks?" asked the defendant's counsel. "Oh! I should know them _anywhere_," said the farmer, who proceeded to describe their peculiarities. "Why," said the prisoner's counsel, "those ducks can't be such a rare breed--I have some very much like them in my yard." "That's not unlikely, sir," said the farmer, "they are not the only ducks I've had stolen lately." Call the next witness. NO PLACE LIKE HOME.--383. A young man, rather verdant, and very sentimental, while making himself interesting to a young lady the other evening by quoting from the poets, to the other choice and rare extracts he added, "There is no place like home." "Do you really think so?" said the young lady. "Oh, yes!" was the reply. "Then," said calico, "why don't you stay there?" DAMAGING THE ENGINE.--384.